Your Poetry Dot Com - I am Tired

I am Tired.
Of feeling I’ve given all myself to you
Of feeling so unattractive because you said am fat
Of feeling I cannot stand up for myself
Of feeling like your slave, ironing, cooking, cleaning, washing
Of seeing happy couples out on the streets loving and laughing
Of feeling miserable and not remembering the last time you made me laugh
Of being cheated on and then lied to my face being told “it’s all in your head”
Of counting how many names I can recall of the ***** that you’ve cheated with
Then u wonder why I cannot have sex, not make love
Because that disappeared when you broke my heart the very first time, then I held on…….
Of being told that am too fat here and there, I have stretch marks
A sign of the struggle and pain I went through bearing our son
Of feeling am not a good enough mother
Of feeling sick when I think about all you’ve done to me
Of being your punch bag every time you loose your temper
Of cleaning after you when you smash a glass or throw a plate of food
Of not being able to question why you have acted in a certain manner
Like, who am I to question you king of the throne
Of feelings that I cannot have my friends around
For you make them feel uncomfortable and they don’t come back
Of feeling disrespected and misunderstood
Of feeling taken advantage of
Running “here” and “there” to get “this” and “that”
And not getting a fraction the same in return
Of telling you that I need “this” and “that” only for you to say you have no money when you are the one with an income
Of feeling used to you advantage
Of feeling the abuse all through again
Tears when you are on top of me an explosion of pain
That I’ve held on for too long
You are the one to bring it all out.
Of being tired of trying to love and please you
Of feeling am loosing my self dignity
Of knowing I deserve better love
Because what we have is not love
I am tired……tomorrow is a new day
Chance to make another change.

sinyorita

This poem is Copyright ยฉ sinyorita