Array ( [sid] => 185338 [catid] => 1 [aid] => mick [title] => I Eat Dog Food [time] => 2018-08-06 22:41:37 [hometext] => A fictional poem. [bodytext] => I once drove a brand new car and lived in a nice apartment.
But now I/'/m dirt poor and I live down by the lake in a tent.
I get angry because of people/'/s attitudes.
People laugh at me because I eat dog food.
I eat it every day because it/'/s cheap.
People laugh because they/'/re creeps.
I started eating dog food because I saw David Letterman do it.
It looked mighty tasty when I saw him chew it.
I eat it at the beach, while riding on buses and subways and at the park.
I/'/m getting worried because all of that dog food has started making me bark.
I/'/ve also started licking my butt and fetching sticks.
When women see me eat dog food, it makes them sick.
If you/'/re wondering if I/'/ll quit, the answer is no.
I/'/ll never stop eating dog food, I need my Alpo.
Please don/'/t point and laugh at me, please don/'/t be rude.
Everybody thinks that I/'/m a freak because I eat dog food. [comments] => 4 [counter] => 76 [topic] => 7 [informant] => randyjohnson [notes] => [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => english [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 0 [ratings] => 0 [editpoem] => 1 [associated] => [topicname] => HumorPoetry ) Your Poetry Dot Com - I Eat Dog Food


I Eat Dog Food
Date: Monday, 6th August 2018 @ 10:41:37 PM AEST
Topic: Sad Poetry


Contributed By: randyjohnson

I once drove a brand new car and lived in a nice apartment.
But now I/'/m dirt poor and I live down by the lake in a tent.
I get angry because of people/'/s attitudes.
People laugh at me because I eat dog food.
I eat it every day because it/'/s cheap.
People laugh because they/'/re creeps.
I started eating dog food because I saw David Letterman do it.
It looked mighty tasty when I saw him chew it.
I eat it at the beach, while riding on buses and subways and at the park.
I/'/m getting worried because all of that dog food has started making me bark.
I/'/ve also started licking my butt and fetching sticks.
When women see me eat dog food, it makes them sick.
If you/'/re wondering if I/'/ll quit, the answer is no.
I/'/ll never stop eating dog food, I need my Alpo.
Please don/'/t point and laugh at me, please don/'/t be rude.
Everybody thinks that I/'/m a freak because I eat dog food.

This poem is Copyright © randyjohnson



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