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(
[sid] => 104343
[catid] => 1
[aid] => mick
[title] => The Broken Promise
[time] => 2005-08-24 21:51:12
[hometext] => There is no topic to describe this poem as there is no way to fathom the heart and the love between creator and created.
[bodytext] => Do you ever wonder is God, who ever he is to you, is guiding your life for a purpose for which you have forgotten?
The stars shone in the firmament
as the Father looked over the valley with his son
A black void in the middle of an endless valley
and above it another void too bright to look into
"Do you understand what you see my son"
I watched the sheep graze in the valley
everything was beautiful and bright with color
and I looked up at my Dad and said "Will I go down there" "Yes" he said "And you no longer will see the beauty that you see here. Life will press upon you on all sides and you will no longer hear my voice as you do now" he said
"I will never lose sight of you. You are my Father forever and i will never hurt you. I love you" I replied. My father looked down at me his face strained, holding back tears. He did not reply to my words except to say "So be it; If you make the journey you will see me again, but not here" Then as his final words rang in my ears, I was born. I opened my eyes and I was a man. There was something I wanted to remember, but could not. I stepped out of a bright light into a cold world and I cried, but it was beautiful. My mother wrapped me in a blanket and held me in her arms until i stopped crying. And my dad gave me my name of which I am proud. I went to sleep under the protection of innocence and love guided me as I was taught how to live. There was something that I needed to remember but it slipped in the back of my mind as my mother called me for dinner. The food was wonderful. Life was beautiful and i was happy.
It was sometime later that I told my first lie. I had never felt such pain. It was as if a part of me had died. I felt alone as guilt washed over me like flood waters covering the earth. Again a part of me was severed as I got angry at my brother and I wished for his death. And again as I stole from my parents. Finaly I became numb and I was able to block out the pain which i later found out was the foreshadowing of my death. Scar upon scar cut into my soul as I doubted and omitted from the promises that I had made those many years ago. I will never get back to where I once was. I know too much. I now understand what my Dad meant when he asked me "Do you understand what you see here?" I do and I am glad that I know although I wish sometimes that i didn''t. What lies ahead on my journey? I do not know. I sometimes stare into the firmament that is like a black glass separating me from what i once knew and I say "I wish I knew you like I did back then" Just a little, the stars roll back and the moon dims and a light shines through. "Then I would not have died" My heart sinks at the words then rises. "Who am I that my creator should take such an interest in me. I will finish my journey Father and I will see you again. I am afraid of what lies beyond the shroud of death but I know that you will be there to greet me. Help me to not break my promise again."
"Then God breathed into man's nostrils and he became a living soul"
[comments] => 9
[counter] => 180
[topic] => 43
[informant] => Archie
[notes] =>
[ihome] => 0
[alanguage] => english
[acomm] => 0
[haspoll] => 0
[pollID] => 0
[score] => 25
[ratings] => 5
[editpoem] => 1
[associated] =>
[topicname] => oops
)
The Broken Promise
Contributed by
Archie
on
Wednesday, 24th August 2005 @ 09:51:12 PM in AEST
Topic:
oops
|
Do you ever wonder is God, who ever he is to you, is guiding your life for a purpose for which you have forgotten?
The stars shone in the firmament
as the Father looked over the valley with his son
A black void in the middle of an endless valley
and above it another void too bright to look into
"Do you understand what you see my son"
I watched the sheep graze in the valley
everything was beautiful and bright with color
and I looked up at my Dad and said "Will I go down there" "Yes" he said "And you no longer will see the beauty that you see here. Life will press upon you on all sides and you will no longer hear my voice as you do now" he said
"I will never lose sight of you. You are my Father forever and i will never hurt you. I love you" I replied. My father looked down at me his face strained, holding back tears. He did not reply to my words except to say "So be it; If you make the journey you will see me again, but not here" Then as his final words rang in my ears, I was born. I opened my eyes and I was a man. There was something I wanted to remember, but could not. I stepped out of a bright light into a cold world and I cried, but it was beautiful. My mother wrapped me in a blanket and held me in her arms until i stopped crying. And my dad gave me my name of which I am proud. I went to sleep under the protection of innocence and love guided me as I was taught how to live. There was something that I needed to remember but it slipped in the back of my mind as my mother called me for dinner. The food was wonderful. Life was beautiful and i was happy.
It was sometime later that I told my first lie. I had never felt such pain. It was as if a part of me had died. I felt alone as guilt washed over me like flood waters covering the earth. Again a part of me was severed as I got angry at my brother and I wished for his death. And again as I stole from my parents. Finaly I became numb and I was able to block out the pain which i later found out was the foreshadowing of my death. Scar upon scar cut into my soul as I doubted and omitted from the promises that I had made those many years ago. I will never get back to where I once was. I know too much. I now understand what my Dad meant when he asked me "Do you understand what you see here?" I do and I am glad that I know although I wish sometimes that i didn''t. What lies ahead on my journey? I do not know. I sometimes stare into the firmament that is like a black glass separating me from what i once knew and I say "I wish I knew you like I did back then" Just a little, the stars roll back and the moon dims and a light shines through. "Then I would not have died" My heart sinks at the words then rises. "Who am I that my creator should take such an interest in me. I will finish my journey Father and I will see you again. I am afraid of what lies beyond the shroud of death but I know that you will be there to greet me. Help me to not break my promise again."
"Then God breathed into man's nostrils and he became a living soul"
Copyright ©
Archie
... [
2005-08-24 21:51:12]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: The Broken Promise
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Wednesday, 24th August 2005 @ 10:25:21 PM AEST
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Info | Send
a Message)
|
*****and I looked up at my Dad and said "Will I go down there" "Yes" he said " he said
"I will never lose sight of you.
Taking in a very deep breath. Very peaceful and promising write.. I am thankful for every day that is created.. for every person and every animal and every plant, stone.... for everything Our Father created just for us..
Yes, I am.. our Father in heaven loved us so much.. Sent His son into a place where sin is practiced.. we go on our merry way... He does not stand in our way...and stil loves us when we fail.. What kind of love.. pure love do you know that can possibly be that perfect...
*****I am afraid of what lies beyond the shroud of death but I know that you will be there to greet me. Help me to not break my promise again.
Beautiful... absolutely beautiful write..
*****"Then God breathed into man's nostrils and he became a living soul"
And here we are.. May God Bless You All.. Allow this poem to be my prayer..
Raquel Leah ; ))
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Re: The Broken Promise
(User Rating: 1 )
by MorningDove on
Wednesday, 24th August 2005 @ 11:05:21 PM AEST
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Info | Send
a Message)
|
Archie, this beautiful poem is a masterpiece. I do not use that term lightly. As you know, I am not religious, but I am spiritual and do believe in a creator. "God" send a masterpiece to live and die and I too sometimes do wonder why? It had to be much more than just forgive our sins, for we are still committing them. This poem so truly touches my soul, my friend. Blessings to you.
Smiles,
Rita |
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Re: The Broken Promise
(User Rating: 1 )
by emystar on
Wednesday, 24th August 2005 @ 11:48:13 PM AEST
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Info | Send
a Message)
|
Very deep, creative, thought provoking write.
good work.
huggs,
emy |
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Re: The Broken Promise
(User Rating: 1 )
by Bruce on
Thursday, 25th August 2005 @ 12:27:51 AM AEST
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Info | Send
a Message)
|
| just beautiful archie, so meaningful |
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Re: The Broken Promise
(User Rating: 1 )
by Jenni_K on
Thursday, 25th August 2005 @ 12:29:56 AM AEST
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Info | Send
a Message)
|
WOW!! Out of this world!!! This has got to be my fav of all your writes. I also am not very religious but I know there is a God up there and he has a purpose for me in life.
Great write, Archie.....
Thank you..
Jenni |
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Re: The Broken Promise
(User Rating: 1 )
by holderofthestone on
Thursday, 25th August 2005 @ 03:22:56 AM AEST
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a Message)
|
wow wow wow! amazing piece here. your words gave me chills... A+++++ great !!!!!!
"Who am I that my creator should take such an interest in me."--- i loved this line... |
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Re: The Broken Promise
(User Rating: 1 )
by thumper on
Thursday, 25th August 2005 @ 08:22:06 AM AEST
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Info | Send
a Message)
|
"Do you ever wonder is God, guiding your life for a purpose for which you have forgotten?" Yes, all the time. This is a bit from the beaten path. A fresh view of something we all wonder about. Great write, enjoyed it immensely! Kudos!
Thumps ;o) |
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Re: The Broken Promise
(User Rating: 1 )
by shelby on
Thursday, 25th August 2005 @ 02:24:37 PM AEST
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a Message)
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this is incredible very heartwarming. Im not a church goer but am spiritual and this touched me deeply
Michelle |
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Re: The Broken Promise
(User Rating: 1 )
by inoc on
Thursday, 25th August 2005 @ 05:06:49 PM AEST
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a Message)
|
Oh simply beautiful to read Archie!
Your message is powerful for believers and unbelievers alike.
I expecially liked ...Who am I that my creator should take an interset in me. I will finish my journey Father and see you again.I am afraid of what lies beyond the shroud of death but I know that you will be there to greet me. Help me to not break my promise again.
I say
...keep keeping God close and His love will never depart....
coni |
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