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Array ( [sid] => 104401 [catid] => 1 [aid] => mick [title] => Water [time] => 2005-08-25 22:02:29 [hometext] => Trying to do a Haiku right [bodytext] => Water

White capped rapids swirl churning a current treacherous

Danger lurkes where young teenagers splashing wade dive and swim

A Young couple tranced embracing tasting first love unconcerned

Sinned [comments] => 4 [counter] => 202 [topic] => 17 [informant] => Sinned [notes] => Edited for Careless Spelling by Moderator_15 (who would also like to note that haikus consist of a syllable structure of 5/7/5) [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => english [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 6 [ratings] => 2 [editpoem] => 0 [associated] => [topicname] => Haiku )

Water

Contributed by Sinned on Thursday, 25th August 2005 @ 10:02:29 PM in AEST
Topic: Haiku

Water

White capped rapids swirl churning a current treacherous

Danger lurkes where young teenagers splashing wade dive and swim

A Young couple tranced embracing tasting first love unconcerned

Sinned

Copyright © Sinned ... [ 2005-08-25 22:02:29]
(Date/Time posted on site)

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Re: Water (User Rating: 1 )
by MorningDove on Thursday, 25th August 2005 @ 10:30:05 PM AEST
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They are hard till you see one then they are simple. It would be like this:

White capped rapids swirl (5 syllables)
Danger lurking for young love (7 syllables)
Love is unaware (5 syllables)

It's always 5/7/5. Easy once you get the hang of it. I love Haiku.

Smiles,
Rita

Re: Water (User Rating: 1 )
by lostrelic on Friday, 26th August 2005 @ 12:54:04 AM AEST
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ah keep trying remember what happened to the last person who was perfect we nailed him to a cross you will get it with practice

Re: Water (User Rating: 1 )
by Archie on Friday, 26th August 2005 @ 10:46:01 AM AEST
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For not being a Haiku it is still a good poem. How can I not be merciful and give you a good rating for trying.

Re: Water (User Rating: 1 )
by STECKS on Wednesday, 14th December 2005 @ 11:21:56 AM AEST
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The poem itself is very interesting. Good write. Keep Practicing on the Haiku format.

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