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Welcome !	Home · FAQ · Topics · Web Links · Your Account · Submit Poetry · Top 30 · OldSite Link	02-June 13:28:55 AEST

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Array ( [sid] => 115095 [catid] => 1 [aid] => mick [title] => closed eye vision strong [time] => 2006-02-20 14:50:06 [hometext] => [bodytext] => solar eclipse a solid flash of my super nova mind
watching essence of dwindled time slowing from behind
a cosmic crash a substantial mark on my vision growing strong
seeing the chaos in the stars feeling this passage is wrong

like feeling empty this void of light a closure of cold fate
surrounding is my anger strong a comet of true hate
wanting fire set threw out this metacosm of my soul
but sucked back in this world of turmoil filling my black hole

a endless maze of endless days a map of useless haze
living in a faded view i live with out thought or faze
i flash back in my mind so soft i forget that past went threw
looking for another passage way i hope to go with you

[comments] => 1 [counter] => 195 [topic] => 73 [informant] => lostrelic [notes] => [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => english [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 13 [ratings] => 3 [editpoem] => 1 [associated] => [topicname] => abstract )

closed eye vision strong

Contributed by lostrelic on Monday, 20th February 2006 @ 02:50:06 PM in AEST
Topic: abstract

solar eclipse a solid flash of my super nova mind
watching essence of dwindled time slowing from behind
a cosmic crash a substantial mark on my vision growing strong
seeing the chaos in the stars feeling this passage is wrong

like feeling empty this void of light a closure of cold fate
surrounding is my anger strong a comet of true hate
wanting fire set threw out this metacosm of my soul
but sucked back in this world of turmoil filling my black hole

a endless maze of endless days a map of useless haze
living in a faded view i live with out thought or faze
i flash back in my mind so soft i forget that past went threw
looking for another passage way i hope to go with you

Copyright © lostrelic ... [ 2006-02-20 14:50:06]
(Date/Time posted on site)

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Re: closed eye vision strong (User Rating: 1 )
by deadheadpoet on Monday, 20th February 2006 @ 04:56:54 PM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)

Relic, little bro, you know I am a fan of your writes. They are usually raw and full of an intenseness, that can't be denied. You have a few misspelled words, but the brilliance of some of your lines, overshadows that for me...

"solar eclipse a solid flash of my super nova mind
watching essence of dwindled time slowing from behind"

well, the whole first stanza was good.
Third stanza was powerful too....this line in particular, I liked.

"a endless maze of endless days a map of useless haze"

Thanks for sharing, Peace to you, Laura

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