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Array ( [sid] => 115530 [catid] => 1 [aid] => mick [title] => My Doomed Canvas [time] => 2006-02-27 19:58:12 [hometext] => please comment [bodytext] => leave me in my gutter
leave me where i lay
this is where i belong
so this is where i'll stay

stop unwrapping my layers
stop trying to tear the self-hatred
i've tried it all and more
but crying is how i was painted

my artist made everything so thick
that with every brush stroke
patterns were left, marks were made
evident whenever i spoke

constantly my canvas exploded
sending shrapnel into everyone in reach
starting again my artist kept things thick
this was one lesson pain would not teach

the thickness blurred reality
for me looking out and those looking in
it was dynamite lit by confusion
a bomb from inside a paint tin

hopes of understanding grew
but quickly my artist reinforced nonsense policies
logic was lost in the only translation i knew
so trust was added to a list of impossibilities [comments] => 3 [counter] => 208 [topic] => 13 [informant] => guiltycircles [notes] => [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => english [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 5 [ratings] => 1 [editpoem] => 1 [associated] => [topicname] => DarkPoetry )

My Doomed Canvas

Contributed by guiltycircles on Monday, 27th February 2006 @ 07:58:12 PM in AEST
Topic: DarkPoetry

leave me in my gutter
leave me where i lay
this is where i belong
so this is where i'll stay

stop unwrapping my layers
stop trying to tear the self-hatred
i've tried it all and more
but crying is how i was painted

my artist made everything so thick
that with every brush stroke
patterns were left, marks were made
evident whenever i spoke

constantly my canvas exploded
sending shrapnel into everyone in reach
starting again my artist kept things thick
this was one lesson pain would not teach

the thickness blurred reality
for me looking out and those looking in
it was dynamite lit by confusion
a bomb from inside a paint tin

hopes of understanding grew
but quickly my artist reinforced nonsense policies
logic was lost in the only translation i knew
so trust was added to a list of impossibilities

Copyright © guiltycircles ... [ 2006-02-27 19:58:12]
(Date/Time posted on site)

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Re: My Doomed Canvas (User Rating: 1 )
by crazy on Monday, 27th February 2006 @ 08:05:51 PM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)

OK your poem is interesting.I like your second stanza.i love how you related your emotions to being painted and the whole art thing.vary intellectual.i would like to know how long it took youe to write this poem?if you dont mind.
for i have a hard time writing like this.
but over all i give a 5 out of 5 well done i would like to see more poem like this.

Re: My Doomed Canvas (User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on Monday, 27th February 2006 @ 08:06:26 PM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)

wow. this is breath taking. you have summarised my life. Your metaphor -ever so enchanting. Imagery-filled figurative language. Effective. Emotive. Melancholy and dark. I really enjoyed and could correlate well to this piece... Thank you for sharing it with us.

Re: My Doomed Canvas (User Rating: 1 )
by guiltycircles on Monday, 27th February 2006 @ 09:58:35 PM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)

it took me about 20 minutes

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