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Array ( [sid] => 120179 [catid] => 1 [aid] => mick [title] => Broken Golden Wake [time] => 2006-05-16 09:45:44 [hometext] => on my inability to gather up and keep love... [bodytext] =>
In this ill-fated hour of lonely themes,
times and places of my crippling years
come crowding back to cloud
the dusty mirror of my memory;
stirring up dull images of vanquished vanities
as you, the fabulous bringer of all my latecoming joy,
once more claims my heart as your own..
gathering it's shattered pieces into your scented palms.

Reincarnated from playful dust and bones,
you return to taunt my jaded need and desperate want;
laughing and scornful - sun-licked..
a style all your own.

Stooped and bent with desire and loss,
I crouch above the keys.. dredging murky depths
to drown the image of you, the Morning Star
of all my habitual middle years;
and you dangle just beyond
the pellucid tip of all my greater sanity.

In a regardless rage, I populate this insubordinate silence
with barely, believable affirmations of self-sufficiency,
battling elements attuned and harmonized to my inner mayhem;
carving into the rock-solid past, a brief postscript
of my diminishing and most essential wisdom
borrowed from sources I no longer
have light enough to enter.

Clawing out to grasp with bonebare fingers,
the hidden hierogliphics of meaning
in the threat of early morning darkness
fading in across the quiet sky,
you touch me with some dire, indirect suggestion
of coming terrors:

the illusive protection of any sought after logic..
hope again growing thinner by the moment..


..admitting the dread of your intolerable absence;
you, who once quenched this now, lurid love in all my heart
merely with a glance.

I huddle in the hollow of no solace..
seeking refuge in some past, now insupportable, peace-
turning random stones of once radiant hue
and finding underneath, the utter disease of promise,
decaying, with an unfounded purpose,
my soulless parameters and rank existence.. desecrated.

I DAMN YOU!
I CONDEMN YOU!

..calling down upon you, a thousand bitter plagues
as thoughts of you flounder in my broken golden wake.


Billy May 2006


[comments] => 8 [counter] => 189 [topic] => 22 [informant] => Man_On_High [notes] => [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => english [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 14 [ratings] => 3 [editpoem] => 1 [associated] => [topicname] => LostLove )
Broken Golden Wake

Contributed by Man_On_High on Tuesday, 16th May 2006 @ 09:45:44 AM in AEST
Topic: LostLove




In this ill-fated hour of lonely themes,
times and places of my crippling years
come crowding back to cloud
the dusty mirror of my memory;
stirring up dull images of vanquished vanities
as you, the fabulous bringer of all my latecoming joy,
once more claims my heart as your own..
gathering it's shattered pieces into your scented palms.

Reincarnated from playful dust and bones,
you return to taunt my jaded need and desperate want;
laughing and scornful - sun-licked..
a style all your own.

Stooped and bent with desire and loss,
I crouch above the keys.. dredging murky depths
to drown the image of you, the Morning Star
of all my habitual middle years;
and you dangle just beyond
the pellucid tip of all my greater sanity.

In a regardless rage, I populate this insubordinate silence
with barely, believable affirmations of self-sufficiency,
battling elements attuned and harmonized to my inner mayhem;
carving into the rock-solid past, a brief postscript
of my diminishing and most essential wisdom
borrowed from sources I no longer
have light enough to enter.

Clawing out to grasp with bonebare fingers,
the hidden hierogliphics of meaning
in the threat of early morning darkness
fading in across the quiet sky,
you touch me with some dire, indirect suggestion
of coming terrors:

the illusive protection of any sought after logic..
hope again growing thinner by the moment..


..admitting the dread of your intolerable absence;
you, who once quenched this now, lurid love in all my heart
merely with a glance.

I huddle in the hollow of no solace..
seeking refuge in some past, now insupportable, peace-
turning random stones of once radiant hue
and finding underneath, the utter disease of promise,
decaying, with an unfounded purpose,
my soulless parameters and rank existence.. desecrated.

I DAMN YOU!
I CONDEMN YOU!

..calling down upon you, a thousand bitter plagues
as thoughts of you flounder in my broken golden wake.


Billy May 2006






Copyright © Man_On_High ... [ 2006-05-16 09:45:44]
(Date/Time posted on site)





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Re: Broken Golden Wake (User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on Tuesday, 16th May 2006 @ 12:24:49 PM AEST
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wow, powerful poem here... got my adrenalin going thats for sure.. memories.. switch your mind to the most pleasant parts of any person, place, or thing.. unless you like pain.. I don't.. RL


Re: Broken Golden Wake (User Rating: 1 )
by katt on Tuesday, 16th May 2006 @ 01:27:39 PM AEST
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Brilliantly written. A pleasure to read. Filled with deep, heartfelt emotion. Enjoyed it.

katt


Re: Broken Golden Wake (User Rating: 1 )
by wizard on Tuesday, 16th May 2006 @ 07:25:05 PM AEST
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wow bro, i love it.

your pain, sadness and resentment shine through perfectly in this write... at the end of this write, it's as if you're treating this 'lost love' as a punching bag of sorts (*wink*)...nice job in this!!!

wiz


Re: Broken Golden Wake (User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on Tuesday, 16th May 2006 @ 07:55:40 PM AEST
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Billy~
Impossibly brilliant. Your words so excellently put together, form the
most amazing of thoughts. This piece, in particular, speaks to me like
no other. I want to paraphrase exactly what moved me, but I'm afraid the
whole compostition would be copied beneath my comment. I can't
begin to explain how your word choice and articulation shattered me.
Completely. [And you say I have emotional writes! meh! *throws POE at you*]

Honestly, this was exquisitely written and your thoughts were masterfully
conveyed. You astound me, mister. Ad infinitum!!! Damn! I'd even
hazard to say this is the best thing I've read to date.

Depth Billy. Incredible depth!!

~Breezy
(hoping that all the forlorn, lonely hearts will soon find the comfort they seek)


Re: Broken Golden Wake (User Rating: 1 )
by Silent-No-More on Tuesday, 16th May 2006 @ 09:45:07 PM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)
Reflection, conscious or unconscious, can be a rubberband of sorts, I think - slingshotting us back to pain, to loss, to broken dreams.... and for those of us with oversized rose colored glasses, to the illusion of what we thought it was before it all fell apart. Indeed, yes - they...

come crowding back to cloud
the dusty mirror of my memory


And it's quite a ride, traveling through slingshotty recollections of the past. It's a journey I'm made myself... and I'll confess that I landed in a heap, all twisted 'round and unable to right myself for quite some time. But, I think, we all eventually do (and even as I say this, it occurs to me that it is terribly cliche to do so *ugh*)... solace comes eventually and the elasticity of particular rubber bands gives out over time.

For those that have known what it is to richote back in time, expectedly or unexpectedly - and even for those that don't.... this.... will, I suspect, scream at them. This, dear Billy, is unavoidably and unquestionably potent and altogether necessary and important. This is that ride... not just put on the page, but carved into it as if you sliced the moment with a knife and let us look on as the guts of it fell out.

Your pen, Billy.... don't ever set it down.


Knocked back a few giant steps,
~Snem
(who rambles ridiculously upon having read something extraordinary)


Re: Broken Golden Wake (User Rating: 1 )
by Eternal_Dreamer on Wednesday, 17th May 2006 @ 07:25:22 AM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)
My dearest Billy~
May ur pen continue on flowing with such incredible and phenomenal masterpieces. (I just wished they were overflowing with happiness and love instead of pain and sadness)The depth and meaning of this write struck deep within my heart. You are an extraordinary, special and truly gifted guy. When we write about our pain it helps heal our wounded heart. May ur life be filled with love, joy and happiness for u so much deserve it my dear friend. May ur heart reign with true love once again real soon Billy.
*love, hugs and kisses*
~*suzie Q*~


Re: Broken Golden Wake (User Rating: 1 )
by brew on Wednesday, 17th May 2006 @ 09:35:39 PM AEST
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The resentment.............the loyalaty but loss...........How can one give, yet can not give if not :given back?! Sadness, with all in this write, yet remorse its , :not;.! Sorry.....I hope you can find IT!!!!!!!!!And they can as well. Good to see you are posting agin, and all is forgiven for double comments.

Always
Brew~


Re: Broken Golden Wake (User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on Thursday, 18th May 2006 @ 12:43:13 PM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)
This rips apart my heart with memories, yet shines in beauty unto itself!




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