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Array ( [sid] => 120460 [catid] => 1 [aid] => mick [title] => larmes de pluie [time] => 2006-05-21 03:38:14 [hometext] => raindrops are falling down [bodytext] => can you see the scene, the park with all its visitors.
The whispering of the wind goes unnoticed amongst the serenade of the birds.
A crowd gathers as a woman plays her life on the viola,
and even the trees are interested.
Couples lay around the grass only concerned with each other,
behaving though they were in their own garden.
They lay contented, their figures silhouetted against the setting sun.
A man sits in silence on a bench feeding the ducks but watching the couples.
It begins to rain and only the man is left,
his tears veiled by the rain. [comments] => 2 [counter] => 289 [topic] => 73 [informant] => Dizza_13 [notes] => [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => english [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 4 [ratings] => 1 [editpoem] => 1 [associated] => [topicname] => abstract )

larmes de pluie

Contributed by Dizza_13 on Sunday, 21st May 2006 @ 03:38:14 AM in AEST
Topic: abstract

can you see the scene, the park with all its visitors.
The whispering of the wind goes unnoticed amongst the serenade of the birds.
A crowd gathers as a woman plays her life on the viola,
and even the trees are interested.
Couples lay around the grass only concerned with each other,
behaving though they were in their own garden.
They lay contented, their figures silhouetted against the setting sun.
A man sits in silence on a bench feeding the ducks but watching the couples.
It begins to rain and only the man is left,
his tears veiled by the rain.

Copyright © Dizza_13 ... [ 2006-05-21 03:38:14]
(Date/Time posted on site)

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Re: larmes de pluie (User Rating: 1 )
by Brasco on Sunday, 21st May 2006 @ 11:47:00 AM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)

I think you captured the scene well, great imagery. I liked the way you covered the full spectrum from joy to sadness.

Re: larmes de pluie (User Rating: 1 )
by wizard on Wednesday, 24th May 2006 @ 05:56:45 AM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)

this is an excellent read..i loved every line!!

wiz

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