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Array ( [sid] => 121430 [catid] => 1 [aid] => mick [title] => Stealing peaches [time] => 2006-06-07 08:16:31 [hometext] => This is a fictional poem [bodytext] => My darn neighbors were stealing peaches from my trees.
They took them by the bushel and this really annoyed me.
If they would've asked for free peaches, I would've said yes.
But they stole them and that's something a man detests.
Other neighbors started stealing my peaches too.
I wasn't going to stand for this, there was something I planned to do.
I was fed up with taking peoples crap.
I decided to start laying out bear traps.
A neighbor fell on one of the bear traps and it snapped off his wiener.
His wife started screaming, you should've seen her.
I was taken to court and lost everything I own.
I wouldn't have used bear traps had I known.
I lost all of my possessions and that's something a man truly loathes.
Now I'm so poor that I have to wear a barrel for clothes. [comments] => 4 [counter] => 231 [topic] => 7 [informant] => randyjohnson [notes] => [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => english [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 5 [ratings] => 1 [editpoem] => 1 [associated] => [topicname] => HumorPoetry )

Stealing peaches

Contributed by randyjohnson on Wednesday, 7th June 2006 @ 08:16:31 AM in AEST
Topic: HumorPoetry

My darn neighbors were stealing peaches from my trees.
They took them by the bushel and this really annoyed me.
If they would've asked for free peaches, I would've said yes.
But they stole them and that's something a man detests.
Other neighbors started stealing my peaches too.
I wasn't going to stand for this, there was something I planned to do.
I was fed up with taking peoples crap.
I decided to start laying out bear traps.
A neighbor fell on one of the bear traps and it snapped off his wiener.
His wife started screaming, you should've seen her.
I was taken to court and lost everything I own.
I wouldn't have used bear traps had I known.
I lost all of my possessions and that's something a man truly loathes.
Now I'm so poor that I have to wear a barrel for clothes.

Copyright © randyjohnson ... [ 2006-06-07 08:16:31]
(Date/Time posted on site)

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Re: Stealing peaches (User Rating: 1 )
by ham323 on Wednesday, 7th June 2006 @ 10:41:07 AM AEST
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Haha. I really like this one. It's very funny.
Good job.

Re: Stealing peaches (User Rating: 1 )
by NoSaint on Wednesday, 7th June 2006 @ 02:48:29 PM AEST
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I truly enjoy your writes...makes the day a little brighter

Shari

Re: Stealing peaches (User Rating: 1 )
by SmileSkinDeep on Wednesday, 7th June 2006 @ 07:37:12 PM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)

its funny, but i'm glad no one was stealing your peaches...that'd be just mean. :) it was nice to hear a funny poem for a change, a breath of fresh air and a good smile

~April

Re: Stealing peaches (User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on Thursday, 8th June 2006 @ 12:45:26 PM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)

Very funny and clever!
You should also have mentioned at the end that now YOU have to steal peaches...LOL

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