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An Ending
Contributed by
Ruby2sdy
on
Monday, 3rd July 2006 @ 11:29:26 AM in AEST
Topic:
Grief
|
If you should return and find me gone,
House empty; life done,
Remember - death is not eternal.
You shall find me still: -
In the photographs smiling from the mantlepiece;
The one of us smiling, that look upon my face,
Written notes in pages of forgotten old books,
Hiding in corners, crevices, and nooks.
And in the moments you find me, I beg you; dont cry,
Be happy for that part of me, with you, alive,
Remember when our hearts beat so close together in time,
I hold you now, through the immortal lines of this rhyme.
And wait for the day when we two shall be free;
Of the mortal binds that restrict both you and me.
Copyright ©
Ruby2sdy
... [
2006-07-03 11:29:26]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: An Ending
(User Rating: 1 )
by lostinmyself on
Monday, 3rd July 2006 @ 11:37:16 AM AEST
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a Message)
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Wow. I like this one even better than your last one.
The whole thing is very well done, I love the structure, and the rhyme.
I would say this was more a happy poem, sad, of course, but generally, it focuses on good, instead of bad.
Good write,
*hugs*
Phyllis xxx |
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Re: An Ending
(User Rating: 1 )
by slayer_015 on
Monday, 3rd July 2006 @ 11:48:28 AM AEST
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You are a goddess of words.That was an amazing poem.Beautiful and sad with a happy ending.I can actually feel your words.Great write!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Brian |
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Re: An Ending
(User Rating: 1 )
by jerseysue on
Monday, 3rd July 2006 @ 01:04:27 PM AEST
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| This is so beautiful, and well written. I can identify with this, as this is like the memories I still have of my late husband. Sue x |
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Re: An Ending
(User Rating: 1 )
by deadheadpoet on
Monday, 3rd July 2006 @ 01:52:58 PM AEST
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Phyllis recommended this write and I'm so glad she did. This piece was thoughtful, sad, yet so utterly beautiful. These lines brought tears to my eyes.......
In the photographs smiling from the mantlepiece;
The one of us smiling, that look upon my face,
Written notes in pages of forgotten old books,
Hiding in corners, crevices and nooks.
Damn, that was touching to my heart. Thank you for sharing.
Peace, Laura |
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Re: An Ending
(User Rating: 1 )
by NoSaint on
Monday, 3rd July 2006 @ 04:45:28 PM AEST
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a work of art
Shari |
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Re: An Ending
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Monday, 3rd July 2006 @ 10:30:32 PM AEST
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Amazingly beautiful, sad, and happy all at the same time. Awesome poem and I must admit...at least to me....a tear jerker of happy & sad tears.
Thank you,
Tim
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Re: An Ending
(User Rating: 1 )
by Jeff_Scott_Morehead on
Tuesday, 4th July 2006 @ 12:00:06 PM AEST
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Wow, the emotions in this one runs like a rollercoaster.
Loved it....excellent.
Jeff |
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Re: An Ending
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Tuesday, 4th July 2006 @ 02:17:55 PM AEST
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I don't find this wierd and that last line my god
" Of the mortal binds that restrict both you and me " you
my friend, are a true poet in every scence of the word. What an enjoyment to read your work all these hidden yet honest emotions exsposed upon the stage of your heart. lovely writting.
*****
Ben |
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Re: An Ending
(User Rating: 1 )
by Spike on
Wednesday, 5th July 2006 @ 08:26:13 AM AEST
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Pretty god damn beautiful. Stirring sentiment, strong imagery. And a lovely way to reconcile loss, as it reminds us that memories, mementos and reminders of the departed are all around us and in us, too.
Spike |
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Re: An Ending
(User Rating: 1 )
by Faust on
Thursday, 13th July 2006 @ 03:12:16 PM AEST
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I love this poem. You conveyed the sense of sorrow but managed to show a glimpse of hope. Very well written.
Eternally Punished,
Faust |
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Re: An Ending
(User Rating: 1 )
by candysears on
Wednesday, 23rd August 2006 @ 04:23:49 PM AEST
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This is beautifully written...
Great work....
God Bless!
C.S |
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