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Array
(
[sid] => 123751
[catid] => 1
[aid] => mick
[title] => Uncontrollable
[time] => 2006-07-27 15:38:51
[hometext] => I guess, It's not quite struggling...but then I am in my own way...
[bodytext] => What the hell is going on? Why does everything feel so wrong? My heart aches, in so much pain. Blood races like pouring rain. Why do I feel this way? Like I have no purpose or meaning to the day. Can one person’s effect do this? Am I going mad, should I just dismiss? I want to smile, be happy like I always do. But this hold you have over me, it must be you. I don’t want to just give up or let it go. Why should I? I just want you to know. But then I’m scared I’ll push you away. I see the fear creeping up on me more each day. I won’t let it take control, consume, devour. I’ll fight it till the dying hour. Still why do you have this effect on me? Escaping trying to be free. Maybe I should just give in. Letting the love win. I won’t be afraid, breathing deep. Get back up, on my feet. Relax, calm down. Start smiling remove that frown. So stop wishing it away. Love, it’s here to stay. [comments] => 2 [counter] => 216 [topic] => 61 [informant] => ManInTheMask [notes] => [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => english [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 0 [ratings] => 0 [editpoem] => 1 [associated] => [topicname] => selfstruggles )
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