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Array ( [sid] => 136867 [catid] => 1 [aid] => mick [title] => Pretty damn old [time] => 2007-08-20 23:24:29 [hometext] => The only true thing about this poem is that today is my birthday. [bodytext] => People are upset because it's my birthday and my age is something I haven't told.
I keep my age a secret because I'm getting pretty damn old.
My bones crackle and my false teeth keep falling out.
When I tell people that I'm a sex machine, they have serious doubts.
Is it possible that I've lost my good looks?
My doctor prescribes me more pills than Elvis took.
Last month I was in the hospital and I got fresh with a candy striper.
I might have stood a chance with her if she wasn't the one who changed my diaper. [comments] => 2 [counter] => 274 [topic] => 10 [informant] => randyjohnson [notes] => [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => english [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 5 [ratings] => 1 [editpoem] => 1 [associated] => [topicname] => BirthdayPoems )

Pretty damn old

Contributed by randyjohnson on Monday, 20th August 2007 @ 11:24:29 PM in AEST
Topic: BirthdayPoems

People are upset because it's my birthday and my age is something I haven't told.
I keep my age a secret because I'm getting pretty damn old.
My bones crackle and my false teeth keep falling out.
When I tell people that I'm a sex machine, they have serious doubts.
Is it possible that I've lost my good looks?
My doctor prescribes me more pills than Elvis took.
Last month I was in the hospital and I got fresh with a candy striper.
I might have stood a chance with her if she wasn't the one who changed my diaper.

Copyright © randyjohnson ... [ 2007-08-20 23:24:29]
(Date/Time posted on site)

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Re: Pretty damn old (User Rating: 1 )
by endlesspath on Monday, 20th August 2007 @ 11:32:16 PM AEST
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what a write, and HAPPY BIRTHDAY. hope your day turns around with wonderful smiles and a brighter out look on all. so your older and who cares, just think of it aging like fine wine. we all have to do it.so many people look at age as your losing all. i look at it as your gaining more;such as knowledge. again cute write, i was laughing at the words, not because they were about aging but about you and the candy striper.

endless

Re: Pretty damn old (User Rating: 1 )
by deadheadpoet on Tuesday, 21st August 2007 @ 01:53:04 AM AEST
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Randy,
This did make me smile. You are so silly. Happy Birthday, my friend. I hope you have a wonderful day. It is also my niece's birthday today. Ella turns 3. so you got yourself a little birthday buddy.
Much peace, love and laughter,
Laura

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