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Under the Storm
Contributed by
zenith66
on
Sunday, 13th July 2008 @ 06:25:54 AM in AEST
Topic:
fantasy
|
At the edge of horizon, a light eating roll, `
The rushing of darkness in sonorous plume,
The grey and the starless comes rearing its head,
Like a harbinger bearing us doom,
And the size of its rising up heaving the sky,
The churning of morning is treacherous black,
A salvo of bleakness outweighing the earth,
And nothing could make it turn back,
By the deafening edges of visible earth,
The frenzied invasion demolishing light,
A cumulus dome of leviathan weight,
Marauding at terrible height,
And out from the maelstrom of darkening wind,
This dreary ablution consuming the sun,
Electrolysed fingers escaping the brink,
The falling of sky has begun,
And its me at the centre of secular things,
Above me the surging of turbulent tides,
Awed By this watery roaming of worlds
With no where remaining to hide...
Copyright ©
zenith66
... [
2008-07-13 06:25:54]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Under the Storm
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Monday, 14th July 2008 @ 02:01:08 AM AEST
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Info | Send
a Message)
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Your command of the language coupled with your poetic flare have given this
piece it's momentum, Z. I don't think I've ever experienced a description of
storms rising quite like this, or with better credence. And I shall never look at
the darkening sky in quite the same way again.
Wonderful job, zenith! Your word choices were brilliant, giving so much power
to the write. Kudos, my dear poet!
~Breezy
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Re: Under the Storm
(User Rating: 1 )
by wizard on
Monday, 14th July 2008 @ 06:13:40 AM AEST
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very nicely done...great visualization and flow...
wiz |
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Re: Under the Storm
(User Rating: 1 )
by Spike on
Tuesday, 15th July 2008 @ 08:54:51 PM AEST
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Very nicely worded, fellow storm maniac. Gravitas and eloquence and sheer, unaduterated worship of the elements. I saw a storm front like this rolling over Arizona, with a cone of rain and cloud, like a tornado, touching the ground from its centre, and felt that huge surge of mixed excitement and trepidation.
Spike |
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Re: Under the Storm
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Saturday, 13th September 2008 @ 01:57:59 PM AEST
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As we arrive back to your home, browsing through your catalogue of poetry and look for a title that catches our attention, we come upon this one. A fascinating and brilliant command of the pen. Never have we heard a storm described so darkly beautiful, with a sense of both wonder and fear. Your wording was majestic and potent. It is a poem that has made a dark eyes lighten. As we get ready to leave your catalogue tonight, we cover our robes with dark rain jackets, fearing a storm on the horizon and preparing to be both enchanted and embraced as your poem has done. Thank you for the invitation to your amazing work. Be forewarned, however, once you invite the ghost alarms in they come bearing nightmares. Sorry about the blood on the floor.
May a giant slimy toad jump through your window tonight, to escape the rain, crawl next to you in bed so that you may wake up to find yourself covered in warts and a witch in your shower.
-The Ghost Alarms
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