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Array
(
[sid] => 146118
[catid] => 1
[aid] => mick
[title] => I'm Evil
[time] => 2008-11-04 23:30:30
[hometext] =>
[bodytext] => I don't know what I want I don't know what I need Why am I always making mistakes What is wrong with me Everything I do is always wrong Everything I say is always stupid I'm always stupid Why Where do I go from here The world is unfolding before my eyes And I think I am losing my way, Straying a little too far off the path I have been hurt many times And I don't seek vengence Yet is still feels like I am at fault, For me, my life, and you Maybe the reason is me Maybe it always was Maybe that is why it is so hard to accept Maybe I'm just crazy How do I find a way home A place that feels the way I long to feel A place I am happy to be How? I am always in this constant battle Telling myself there is reason still to fight But slowly I find myself falling Drowning in this pain that could be all my fault I never meant to hurt you It was never my intention But it happened and I can't turn back So I'm stuck, just stuck. I wish I didn't mess up I wish I never hurt you I wish the pain was not my fault But it could well be all my fault I never knew what to expect I never knew how it would end I never thought it would be so hard But my nightmares are coming true Please don't be mad I'm sorry I messed up It is what I always do And what I've always done I wish I knew how to help But the truth is I'm hurting too Wishing I could give up Knowing that I can't I don't know what to live for anymore But I know I have to try So I cry myself to sleep because I messed up my life I should have never left her Then there would be no reason for excuses I keep holding on to nothing And it makes me hurt myself more Why am I so stupid Why am I so dumb Why am I so crazy Why am I growing numb... I'm a monster I'm the devil I have to be How could I hurt so many people if I wasn't So I have to be I'm sorry for my troubles I'm sorry for pulling you in I think I should dissapear Save you the trouble now So I don't hurt you too So Bye my friend I'm sorry I can't keep being right here Knowing I'll somehow hurt you if I do Call me crazy Say it is in my head In the end I'm still just evil So please just trust me And please just save yourself, From me [comments] => 3 [counter] => 193 [topic] => 13 [informant] => Butterflyperfect [notes] => [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => english [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 0 [ratings] => 0 [editpoem] => 1 [associated] => [topicname] => DarkPoetry )
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