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Array
(
[sid] => 151336
[catid] => 1
[aid] => mick
[title] => Mask
[time] => 2009-07-07 21:20:33
[hometext] =>
[bodytext] => There’s a certain time of day when I feel it creeping up A slow, drawn out processes ensues I swallow desperately to keep the sick rot in my throat I don’t want to release it into the world, don’t want to hear it Or face it A monster that grows hourly, until it is too great to sustain Pries open my lips and compels screams forward Screams scratching my vocal chords, ripping my mouth with its treachery Screams of your name At this time of day I crumble Weak and restless, I sink into the hollow of your lies All that you have done and continue on with I can’t close my eyes to see you as anyone other than this devil The worst part of remembering you Is remembering that I didn’t know you Not you, the man who abandoned his family Left his children fatherless I do not know you for the evil that you are And your name weights down my soul You have forsaken everything in my life, in our life together You have not become someone new, you are not a different man You are the monster that was hiding behind the mask For years you wore this other man The man desperate to hug and kiss his children The man faithful to his wife and dedicated Dedicated to his family He was the mask and I loved him I kissed him goodnight and I wrapped my arms around him I believed him to love me I believed him to be real But you were hiding the whole time Dawning that man in the morning and ripping him off at night Kissing me tenderly before you left and then peeling him off and sliding him under the seat of your car You make me sick with all the lies and my eyes are burning from what I see in you now The reality of who you are, what you are Disgusting. I don’t want to know you, Josh You fathered children and left them to never know a man who kisses and hugs A man who holds them in high regards and puts them before himself YOU LEFT THEM After all that you had done to wear that damn mask Couldn’t you put that much effort into being a true man? You are fake, a plastic face and I want to watch it melt Melt in the heat of revelation I see you, and my eyes are burning I see you, for who you really are I see you, disgusting, cowardly shell of a human I see you and I am begging God for the freedom to look away [comments] => 2 [counter] => 156 [topic] => 39 [informant] => weepingprophet [notes] => [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => english [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 0 [ratings] => 0 [editpoem] => 1 [associated] => [topicname] => Grief )
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