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Array ( [sid] => 165104 [catid] => 1 [aid] => mick [title] => Under the Same Sky [time] => 2011-03-05 22:39:53 [hometext] => [bodytext] => In a mind cluttered with nonsense,
You cross my mind often-you find a home in my thoughts.
All our memories are like my shadow,
Often left behind but never lost.
Even though it’s easy to lose sight of where we were headed,
Blindsided by the bumps in the road thrown our way.
But since it was so easy to forget the vision we had,
Maybe it means- we would have never made it anyway.
We created people that we weren’t,
Just to settle on the thought that we had been renewed.
And now I see maybe I wasn’t meant to be,
The person I would have become with you.
Now the people we have become sit with tide tongues,
Afraid to spill the thoughts our hand me down hearts would never scream.
Because our hearts never forget what our minds can’t remember,
Our words will forever echo in our dreams.
But quiet our minds and mute our words,
In a world where you never really have to say goodbye.
Because no matter where our maps may have led us,
We’re always under the same electric sky.
[comments] => 2 [counter] => 230 [topic] => 44 [informant] => jazzyfizzle [notes] => [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => english [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 0 [ratings] => 0 [editpoem] => 1 [associated] => [topicname] => Nostalgic )

Under the Same Sky

Contributed by jazzyfizzle on Saturday, 5th March 2011 @ 10:39:53 PM in AEST
Topic: Nostalgic

In a mind cluttered with nonsense,
You cross my mind often-you find a home in my thoughts.
All our memories are like my shadow,
Often left behind but never lost.
Even though it’s easy to lose sight of where we were headed,
Blindsided by the bumps in the road thrown our way.
But since it was so easy to forget the vision we had,
Maybe it means- we would have never made it anyway.
We created people that we weren’t,
Just to settle on the thought that we had been renewed.
And now I see maybe I wasn’t meant to be,
The person I would have become with you.
Now the people we have become sit with tide tongues,
Afraid to spill the thoughts our hand me down hearts would never scream.
Because our hearts never forget what our minds can’t remember,
Our words will forever echo in our dreams.
But quiet our minds and mute our words,
In a world where you never really have to say goodbye.
Because no matter where our maps may have led us,
We’re always under the same electric sky.

Copyright Â© jazzyfizzle ... [ 2011-03-05 22:39:53]
(Date/Time posted on site)

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Re: Under the Same Sky (User Rating: 1 )
by emystar on Saturday, 5th March 2011 @ 11:05:06 PM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)

Great writing. Takes me back a ways.
blessings,
emy

Re: Under the Same Sky (User Rating: 1 )
by hacktastic on Sunday, 6th March 2011 @ 01:05:32 AM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)

For me, your writing had three stand out, awesome parts to it:

1) "All our memories are like my shadow,
Often left behind but never lost."

2) "Afraid to spill the thoughts our hand me down hearts would never scream."

3) "Because no matter where our maps may have led us, We’re always under the same electric sky."

These parts were very strong & visual. I am sorry you had to go through so much pain to get there.

Lastly, I noticed a spelling error. It reads "tide" instead of "tied." But the idea of "tied tongues" like an oceans tide, that could be very interesting...

Nice work!

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