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Array
(
[sid] => 167430
[catid] => 1
[aid] => mick
[title] => Sadness In The Shadows
[time] => 2011-09-20 06:09:11
[hometext] =>
[bodytext] => Sadness In The Shadows Sitting in the worn, old second-hand armchair I stare blankly at the wall opposite. Inside the whorls and patterns formed in the sepia stained paintwork are my friends; My obfuscated mind sees old partners, dead family members – lost acquaintances. They appear fuzzy but in my reality exist and sit as silent witness to my decline. To the ordinary mind, to normal vision they would appear as months of neglect Walls stained by the constant flow of cigarette smoke passing across them. Shakily I raise the warm can of lager to my mouth mindless to the fact that to my left, The morning sun has only just risen and streams through the curtain-less windows. Shadows from sparse furnishings are thrown across the marked tile flooring; Teasing my mind as yet more familiar faces are invited to the macabre scene. The can falls from my hand and without reaction watch it fall to the floor, The contents spilling from the open mouth erasing the newly arrived guests. Reaching for the table in front of me I grasp with difficulty the box of pills. Here lies my new-found and most prized, most reliable relative of choice. It never ceases to amaze me how much more difficult it has become to open, Extract and push out two or three of the Diazepam from the packaging inside. Ignoring the previously discarded can I reach for another and swallow greedily. It is so annoying that the pills will take half an hour to bring me peace of mind. I have no idea of the passage of time when the pills take effect and I sit back. For all I know I could have been sitting there for hours or even days. The thought of actually leaving the flat and embracing clean air is anathema. There are no real friends any more, merely memories of a former life. Nobody cares but there again I have not gone out to seek any assistance. I have only myself to blame and I blink as the tears stream down my face. [comments] => 1 [counter] => 62 [topic] => 48 [informant] => aliopterix [notes] => [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 0 [ratings] => 0 [editpoem] => 1 [associated] => [topicname] => EmotionalPoetry )
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