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Array
(
[sid] => 177384
[catid] => 1
[aid] => mick
[title] => Gone
[time] => 2013-12-20 04:41:29
[hometext] =>
[bodytext] => Valentine's, 2012 You held me like there was no one else A year has past, and I finally see You were seeing her while holding me I was only there to ease the aches Of the finer things the Reaper takes And now I find I'm jealous of Another girl you'll always love I've had my trials; I've shed my tears I would be dead if you weren't here But that gratitude is slipping fast When I catch these glimpses of your past You always were her biggest fan If she couldn't have you, no one can You made it obvious to me I'm not that girl you'd wish I'd be The compliments were easy then Perhaps because they weren't pretend... And even though she rests in death You shut me out for that lacking breath If there's just one who has your heart Whether she be worlds apart I'll never see the whole of you I never see a love that's true And in the chaos that we've shared I remember how little I compared When faced against such little girls... It's easy when I'm not your world Even when she betrayed your love No one else could be enough And though the Karma had come through She still means the world to you The universe in it's mysterious ways Tried to bring you brighter days And still you gave up all your soul On one little girl that had made you whole Never can I measure up So never can I get that love And knowing how it feels to lose I just wish she hadn't borken you But selfishness still reigns inside I still wish it was me who died Two pairs of loves who's stars were crossed Two shining hearts the world has lost And I know how these pains never heal And I know my dreams of Him aren't real Still while I find I can't begin to see I know that we weren't meant to be But you and I--we could have loved 10 years alone, they're not enough Still I know I was just a kid And I can never forgive the things He did The way He left me, hanging dry The way He let his future die The way He gave me all the world Then stole it back--I'm not His girl While He was still my greatest friend There was a reason for His end I didn't need need groups to help I dealt with everything myself I didn't curl down at His feet And pray God return what he stole from me Instead, I faced the future days In hopes I could redeem His waste But you don't move; you sit and wait She threw a hook--you took the bait You cry and wonder why it was God had stolen all you loved I did this, too, but I moved past Knowing that it wouldn't last But you stayed still; you know the truth She was your love and she loved you I'm sorry I can't be that way I'm sorry that I'm part to blame I'm sorry that I'm just not her I'm sorry that you feel that hurt I'm sorry that I'll never be That girl that wanders through your dreams I'm sorry that you had to cry I'm sorry that I didn't die [comments] => 0 [counter] => 46 [topic] => 75 [informant] => satanssecret1369 [notes] => [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => english [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 0 [ratings] => 0 [editpoem] => 1 [associated] => [topicname] => anguished )
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