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Array ( [sid] => 179932 [catid] => 1 [aid] => mick [title] => 4J9 [time] => 2014-12-04 03:17:05 [hometext] => Love that is always Love [bodytext] => 4J9 by Fred Monte Lassonde

What more can I say

that I have not said

I Love you to this day

May that not go unsaid

Forever is forever still

Love you forever I will

If as a Brother it may only be

Then Sister I still Love thee

Now real Love is always True

It only wants all the best 4 you

Seeking your welfare in what it does

In its nature Loving you just because

4 itself wanting your best to be

Knowing that may not always

Include what one wants you see

Yet it does include the best of days

Your well being is in its Heart

When recognized you will see

That True Love will never depart

It is there and forever will be

Now I try once again to let you know

Love wants your best, more than fine

True Love will not die only will grow

Always the Truest of Love 4J9

©Fred Monte Lassonde 2014
[comments] => 2 [counter] => 124 [topic] => 24 [informant] => fredmonte101 [notes] => [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => english [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 0 [ratings] => 0 [editpoem] => 1 [associated] => [topicname] => LoveRemembered )

4J9

Contributed by fredmonte101 on Thursday, 4th December 2014 @ 03:17:05 AM in AEST
Topic: LoveRemembered

4J9 by Fred Monte Lassonde

What more can I say

that I have not said

I Love you to this day

May that not go unsaid

Forever is forever still

Love you forever I will

If as a Brother it may only be

Then Sister I still Love thee

Now real Love is always True

It only wants all the best 4 you

Seeking your welfare in what it does

In its nature Loving you just because

4 itself wanting your best to be

Knowing that may not always

Include what one wants you see

Yet it does include the best of days

Your well being is in its Heart

When recognized you will see

That True Love will never depart

It is there and forever will be

Now I try once again to let you know

Love wants your best, more than fine

True Love will not die only will grow

Always the Truest of Love 4J9

©Fred Monte Lassonde 2014

Copyright Â© fredmonte101 ... [ 2014-12-04 03:17:05]
(Date/Time posted on site)

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Re: 4J9 (User Rating: 1 )
by Waynster on Thursday, 4th December 2014 @ 05:48:49 AM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)

Hi, I really like your poem, it is really good. However, I noticed the flow of it tends to throw a reader off because you mix your style when you write it. Your rhyming does not stay consistent, in each stanza it changes, really something to consider, to make your poetry sound that much better. You want to try to grasp the reader, not throw them off. If you grasp the reader with your words, you can make them feel your words through what you write. Not trying to be mean, just sharing with you what I see. Keep on writing though, very good poem.

Wayne

Re: 4J9 (User Rating: 1 )
by ladyfawn on Thursday, 4th December 2014 @ 05:23:15 PM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)

beautiful and lovingly penned, i re-read it after i saw
wayne's comment and i believe it's the forth stanza that
actually does throw one off a bit:: the poem does not
even need that stanza, the rest is excellent, and
quite moving:)

hugs n' love nessa

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