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Array ( [sid] => 182717 [catid] => 1 [aid] => mick [title] => The Brick, A Follow Up [time] => 2016-03-03 20:26:32 [hometext] => This is a follow up on my first poetic creation, The Brick. You can find it on this site as well. [bodytext] => There/'/s a brick,
It haunts me.
The words I wrote,
After all these years,
They/'/re still with me.
Twelve years since penned,
No longer in school.
Still it remains unpainted,
Unchanged, but weathered,
Even as me.
Forgive the grammar,
It merely fit.
I remember the glimmer of hope
Shining through the fog and clouds.
Through now with it/'/s mocking,
It/'/s gone,
Leaving only the pain,
Memories of abuse.
The query posed at the end?
The answer has been revealed.
No. [comments] => 1 [counter] => 181 [topic] => 21 [informant] => Solmyr1404 [notes] => [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => english [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 0 [ratings] => 0 [editpoem] => 1 [associated] => [topicname] => Lifepoems )

The Brick, A Follow Up

Contributed by Solmyr1404 on Thursday, 3rd March 2016 @ 08:26:32 PM in AEST
Topic: Lifepoems

There/'/s a brick,
It haunts me.
The words I wrote,
After all these years,
They/'/re still with me.
Twelve years since penned,
No longer in school.
Still it remains unpainted,
Unchanged, but weathered,
Even as me.
Forgive the grammar,
It merely fit.
I remember the glimmer of hope
Shining through the fog and clouds.
Through now with it/'/s mocking,
It/'/s gone,
Leaving only the pain,
Memories of abuse.
The query posed at the end?
The answer has been revealed.
No.

Copyright © Solmyr1404 ... [ 2016-03-03 20:26:32]
(Date/Time posted on site)

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Re: The Brick, A Follow Up (User Rating: 1 )
by Invierno on Thursday, 10th March 2016 @ 06:50:28 AM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)

Keep writing and the answer WILL be revealed. It is inside you, of course, so how can it not be pulled back and viewed?

I am loathe to distribute even positive critical advice, but will add that you needn/'/t EVER apologize for your use of words...they are yours to abuse, beautify or discard...and to detract from within a poem to apologize is simply not needed, " Forgive the grammar,
It merely fit.". If you feel that strongly, write a poem about your grammar. There is NOTHING that is beyond the examination of our mind and execution of our pen.

I enjoyed your poem and now must go read, /'/The Brick/'/.

Invierno

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