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Array
(
[sid] => 19146
[catid] => 1
[aid] => Mick
[title] => Aftermath
[time] => 2003-06-17 01:05:00
[hometext] => this poem was written right after my best friend was killed. i felt like it was my fault.
[bodytext] => Aftermath I am trapped back here again where i didnt want to be turned cynical to all thats good trying to change reality i fill myself with this regret i cant stop living the mistake can i blame you for all this pain? for all the lies you chose to make. I dont deseve, I can not trust It was ripped away from me, So ashamed, the guilt, the pain, everything is so deranged. I want to cut my life away, fill all my hurt with blood and rage to watch the crimson slowly drip to take myself and watch me fade i stained the floor with my red tears of overwhelming worthless pride you ***** sink inside my mind theres no where left for me to hide I dont deserve, I can not trust It was ripped away from me, so ashamed, the guilt, the pain, everything is so deranged. I am alone now, no ones here theres no one left to watch me fall i ruined it all with ignorance i expected too much after all and slowly scars begin to fade just like they had done before another test in which i failed and i dont want you anymore. [comments] => 2 [counter] => 274 [topic] => 48 [informant] => threat2society [notes] => [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => english [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 0 [ratings] => 0 [editpoem] => 1 [associated] => [topicname] => EmotionalPoetry )
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