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Array ( [sid] => 33717 [catid] => 1 [aid] => mick [title] => not as they seem to be [time] => 2004-02-03 19:51:35 [hometext] => [bodytext] => flowers in the meadow
birds in the trees
all that is here
is not as it seems to be
the flowers are all wilted
and the birds are all dead
and all there is now
is a meadow of dread

the people who came
made happiness sorrow
and all there is now
is pain for tomorrow
someone needs to see
what the people have done
this madness needs to stop
for the battle is not yet won

someone needs to show them
how life should be
just why can not they see
how many deaths will it take
until they know
that too many people have died
someone needs to tell them now
to stop.
that too many have cried
[comments] => 2 [counter] => 151 [topic] => 43 [informant] => SAT [notes] => [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => english [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 13 [ratings] => 3 [editpoem] => 1 [associated] => [topicname] => oops )

not as they seem to be

Contributed by SAT on Tuesday, 3rd February 2004 @ 07:51:35 PM in AEST
Topic: oops

flowers in the meadow
birds in the trees
all that is here
is not as it seems to be
the flowers are all wilted
and the birds are all dead
and all there is now
is a meadow of dread

the people who came
made happiness sorrow
and all there is now
is pain for tomorrow
someone needs to see
what the people have done
this madness needs to stop
for the battle is not yet won

someone needs to show them
how life should be
just why can not they see
how many deaths will it take
until they know
that too many people have died
someone needs to tell them now
to stop.
that too many have cried

Copyright © SAT ... [ 2004-02-03 19:51:35]
(Date/Time posted on site)

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Re: not as they seem to be (User Rating: 1 )
by arden on Tuesday, 3rd February 2004 @ 08:15:22 PM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)

awesome write, good flow, ill be lookin out for more of your work.

Arden

Re: not as they seem to be (User Rating: 1 )
by kieran on Tuesday, 3rd February 2004 @ 08:29:15 PM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)

interesting piece, I like it. Whats great is the fact that you are ambigous about what your subject matter is - it could be anything!
One critisim though, it could be shorter..some lines have been fleshed out too much, the emotion is very in your face, not particularly subtle.

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