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Array
(
[sid] => 40423
[catid] => 1
[aid] => mick
[title] => Father Rather
[time] => 2004-03-26 21:21:12
[hometext] => My father is dying from terminal cancer.
[bodytext] => Father rather often wishes that I had never ran away from the family just to be devilsih and contrite, daughter schmater, my father can't remember my age, I wonder if the tumor has deleted two years of my life from his memory, then I recall that he never got my age right, Father rather that I never let that boy with his charmed tongue into my life or pants for heavens sake, but the two of us did make a beautiful sight, daughter,slaughter my father can't come to see me alone because he can't remember how to get home then I wonder with paranoid cold flashes if soon he will only remember the way we'd fight, Father rather not go to his appointments for chemo injections he does it for her and his childish demons, it's hard to say which one of them has more might, daughter rather speak to the land then listen to death's whine as it chokes the cells of my father's frontal lobes while my brother cries silent tears born of fright, rather Father not let go, he wages bloody war against death I am exsperated from explaining that it's just one more path on his journey not even this golden truth makes it alright, Father rather watch the hours pass by with agonizing fear then live fully what time graciously serves on a silver platter for him every night, Father father doesn't show any joy at seeing my face only a whince as he mutter under his ragged staunchy breath seems I am not the only one who is stumbling on the high steps of forgiving and forgetting I will for now not take that April flight daughter rather remember that I stayed to watch my father die then run like hell to some place where death and it's rancid breath can't bite. [comments] => 2 [counter] => 158 [topic] => 39 [informant] => sheri [notes] => [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => english [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 0 [ratings] => 0 [editpoem] => 1 [associated] => [topicname] => Grief )
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