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On The Inside
Contributed by
Alli
on
Tuesday, 20th April 2004 @ 10:32:09 AM in AEST
Topic:
InspirationalPoems
|
So if I stray too far from home
And seem to have lost my way
And the person who returns to you
Isn't what she is today
Don't try too hard to understand
The things that I've been through
Just be my friend and love me
And know that I love you
When rainclouds form behind my eyes
And a storm is moving in
And you don't know if you're strong enough
To fight what you can't win
Don't feel like you're giving up
If you decide to jump the ship
Just be there to hold me
When on reality I lose my grip
Sometimes I feel I'm failing
Losing what I always had
Or maybe I'm just changing
But is it good or bad?
Well here's a little secret
And only in you I confide
When everything about me seems different
I'm still the same on the inside.
2003
Copyright ©
Alli
... [
2004-04-20 10:32:09]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: On The Inside
(User Rating: 1 )
by Ramuel on
Tuesday, 20th April 2004 @ 10:45:10 AM AEST
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Good poem. Exellent rhythm and flow. I like the rhyming, too. You might try breaking up each rhyming set into its own stanza, just to make things a bit more organized...
Good peice 4 out of 5
-Ramuel |
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Re: On The Inside
(User Rating: 1 )
by Naburus on
Tuesday, 20th April 2004 @ 11:21:02 AM AEST
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| A good poem. One of the reasons I like poems is the tragicness. That is what makes this a good read. |
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Re: On The Inside
(User Rating: 1 )
by amalyna on
Tuesday, 20th April 2004 @ 11:41:15 AM AEST
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| very well done...I can definitely relate to this one |
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Re: On The Inside
(User Rating: 1 )
by kandis on
Tuesday, 20th April 2004 @ 01:19:37 PM AEST
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I really liked what you had to say and the way you said it. Very well written.
Kandis |
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Re: On The Inside
(User Rating: 1 )
by Remy on
Tuesday, 20th April 2004 @ 02:12:02 PM AEST
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careful penned out thoughts, so it seems to be anyways... i like the themes in this, good stuff! ;0)
~Remy~ |
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Re: On The Inside
(User Rating: 1 )
by Kie on
Tuesday, 20th April 2004 @ 02:51:33 PM AEST
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This is a great poem. I do agree that if you broke the poem into stanzas it would be excellent and easier to read.
Great poem.
Kie |
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Re: On The Inside
(User Rating: 1 )
by lostinmyself on
Thursday, 22nd April 2004 @ 01:01:42 PM AEST
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| brilliant poem. great flow and language. great message too. *hugs* phil xxx |
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Re: On The Inside
(User Rating: 1 )
by SweetRhythm on
Tuesday, 3rd August 2004 @ 10:51:15 AM AEST
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Awh that was lovely. The rythem and flow was great the way each vese melodiously ran into the next, a great poetic job indeed. It is however very true, someimes we are going through hard times and act a little insance & sometimes don't even recognise ourself anymore but behind it all we are no doubt the same person within.
Corinna |
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