Your Poetry Dot Com

Welcome to Your Poetry Dot Com - Read, Rate, Comment on, or Submit Poetry. Browse Poetry Forums, or just enjoy other parts of our poetic community.
One of the largest databases of poetry on the net, now over 198,500+ poems!

Poems On Site: 198,500+ Comments On Poems: 427,000+ Forum Posts: 105,000+

Custom Search


Welcome !	Home · FAQ · Topics · Web Links · Your Account · Submit Poetry · Top 30 · OldSite Link	02-June 13:08:13 AEST

Menu

· Our eBay Store

· Error Submit

Poetry

· Submit Poetry

· Least Read Poems

· Members Listing

· Old Site Post 2001

· Old Site Pre 2001

· Poetry Archive

· Public Domain Poetry

Stories

· Stories (NEW ! )

· Submit Story

· Story Topics

· Stories Archive

· Story Search

Community

· Our Poetry Forums

· Our Arcade
100's of Games !

Site Help

· FAQ

· Feedback

Members Areas

· Your Account

· Members Journals

· Premium Sign-Up

Premium Section

· Special Section

· Premium Poems

· Premium Submit

· Premium Search

· Premium Archive

· Premium Topics

Fun & Games

· Jokes

· Bubble Puzzle

· Cross Word Easy

· Word Hunt

Reference

· Dictionary (Rhyming)

· Site Updates

· Special Content

Search

Top

Help This Site

· Donations

Others

· Moderators

Our Other Sites

· Embroidery Design Store
· Your Jokes
· Special Urls
· JM Embroideries
· Public Domain Poetry and Stories
· Diamond Dotz
· Cooking Info and Recipes
· Quoof - Australian Story

Social

Array ( [sid] => 47725 [catid] => 1 [aid] => mick [title] => happiness [time] => 2004-05-16 05:04:45 [hometext] => This is the first poetry of my life. Please go through it and comment about it. [bodytext] => I asked all, I asked them, him and her
I went anywhere and everywhere
What happiness is, what it is all about
I did all my best to find it out

He said he was the one of the wealthiest
With money, had collected all assets
But thinking about true happiness
He said nothing but felt only emptiness

She always smiled and she looked never sad
She might have the answer, I was sure she had
But she said she had spent her life looking for it
Had always failed and could never get an inch of it.

They all say happiness is hard to explore
Once you acquire it, you want it more
But you cannot always be sad and gloomy
Therefore you should pretend to be happy

But I am sick and tired of grieves and regrets
I want to be happy but without pretends
I want to find happiness and its way
Somebody please help me clear my dismay.

[comments] => 3 [counter] => 187 [topic] => 39 [informant] => Kusum [notes] => [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => english [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 17 [ratings] => 4 [editpoem] => 1 [associated] => [topicname] => Grief )

happiness

Contributed by Kusum on Sunday, 16th May 2004 @ 05:04:45 AM in AEST
Topic: Grief

I asked all, I asked them, him and her
I went anywhere and everywhere
What happiness is, what it is all about
I did all my best to find it out

He said he was the one of the wealthiest
With money, had collected all assets
But thinking about true happiness
He said nothing but felt only emptiness

She always smiled and she looked never sad
She might have the answer, I was sure she had
But she said she had spent her life looking for it
Had always failed and could never get an inch of it.

They all say happiness is hard to explore
Once you acquire it, you want it more
But you cannot always be sad and gloomy
Therefore you should pretend to be happy

But I am sick and tired of grieves and regrets
I want to be happy but without pretends
I want to find happiness and its way
Somebody please help me clear my dismay.

Copyright © Kusum ... [ 2004-05-16 05:04:45]
(Date/Time posted on site)

Advertisments:

Previous Posted Poem | | Next Posted Poem

Sorry, comments are no longer allowed for anonymous, please register for a free membership to access this feature and more

All comments are owned by the poster. Your Poetry Dot Com is not responsible for the content of any comment.
That said, if you find an offensive comment, please contact via the FeedBack Form with details, including poem title etc.

Re: happiness (User Rating: 0 )
by Former_Member on Sunday, 16th May 2004 @ 05:32:20 AM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)

First Poem sure turned out to be nice.. Good going.. looking foward to see more..

The_Poet

Re: happiness (User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on Sunday, 16th May 2004 @ 08:26:55 AM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)

I'll assume you mean your first ever poem. If it is, thanks for sharing it with us here at YPDC.

Ok. Your structure shows promise,as I appreciate the use of three perspectives, throughout three respective stanzas, with a defined introduction and a conclusion about the subject matter: emotion of happiness.

Emotions are difficult to explain, and you tackle this very subject well, what with the theme and content actually being about the ambiguity and evasiveness of true happiness itself.

I also appreciate your requirement to make it rhyme, as my preference is towards poems that rhyme. There are a few negative points, but these are merely concerned with spelling and grammatical errors that can be easily corrected.

One such point I could make, would be where you use 'pretends' against 'regrets' in the last stanza. I would change this to use 'pretence' against 'regret', as it keeps the same meaning, but rhymes and flows better.

Anyway - this is an encouraging start.
Keep writing.

Re: happiness (User Rating: 1 )
by ladyfawn on Sunday, 16th May 2004 @ 11:17:53 AM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)

beautifully written, we all search for happiness, i believe that those who truely know happiness must have had suffering in their lives; for there would be no other way to recognize it otherwise, warm welcome to ypdc, hugs n' love nessa

@->>->:-

While every care is taken to ensure the general sites content is family safe, our moderators cannot be in all places; all the time. Please report poetry and or comments that are in breach of our site rules HERE (Please include poem title or url). Parents also please ensure that you supervise your children well when they are on the internet; regardless of what a site says about being, or being considered, child-safe.

Poetry is much like a great photo, a single "moment in time" capturing many feelings and emotions. Yet, they are very alive; creating stirrings within the readers who form visual "pictures" of the expressed emotions within the Poem. ©

Opinions expressed in the poetry, comments, forums etc. on this site are not necessarily those of this site, its owners and/or operators; but of the individuals who post items to this site.
Frequently Asked Questions | | | Privacy Policy | | | Contact Webmaster

All submitted items are Copyright © to their submitter. All the rest Copyright © 2002-2050 by Your Poetry Dot Com

All logos and trademarks in this site are property of their respective owners.

Script Generation Time: 0.052 Seconds. - View our Site Map | .© your-poetry.com