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Array
(
[sid] => 49129
[catid] => 1
[aid] => mick
[title] => Hopelessness
[time] => 2004-05-25 21:22:05
[hometext] => wrote this during what I thought was my darkest hour. This is a true story
[bodytext] => I feel like ripping my hair out I feel like screaming at the top of my lungs no matter what I do no one listens no matter where I go no one listens Do this and do that is what they say Don't do this and don't do that is what they say I feel so hopeless Turn left, turn right, sit down, stand up stop, go, run, walk, get a job, go to college This is what they all say I feel so helpless I'm so confused I don't know what to do I'm so confused I don't know who to listen too I can't hear my inner voice anymore It's hopeless for me to even try to argue It's hopeless for me to even try to do anything It's hopeless for me to even go out anywhere It's hopeless for me to even look for my knight I know I'll never find him now Everyone’s telling me I'm useless Everyone’s telling me I'll never see old age Everyone’s telling me to stop complaining Everyone’s keeps telling me something No one listens without judging me I feel so hopeless to live my life It's in the hands of others When will I take the reins and lead? When will I have the freedom To come and go as I please My relationships have been a strain cause of the reins people have on me I'm wishing when I pulling on the reins they snap I feel so hopeless Someone’s taken control of my life And it is not me My only solace is music and work But now work is telling me what to do and what not to do How to do it and when to do it People say you have to go to school You have to get a job You have to make money You can't do this without telling me You can't go here unless I know were u are When ur coming back Who ur going with I feel so hopeless I feel like crying and screaming These people have cost me boyfriends These people have cost me opportunities And now these people will cost me my schooling They say no you can't stay in residence You have to take the 2 hours bus ride to and froe You'll have to wast that 2 hours on the bus Instead of studying or chatting with friends You'll have to wast that 2 hours when you could be making friends and partying You'll have to wast that 2 hours and fail You'll have to wast that 2 hours And come home in the dark They want me to be free Then they say I can't be They want me to live my life Then they take it away It's better if no one knows me It's better if people leave I don't want anyone messed up with me It's not fair to them But I crave my freedom I crave what little friends I have [comments] => 1 [counter] => 143 [topic] => 48 [informant] => StoneAngel [notes] => [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => english [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 5 [ratings] => 1 [editpoem] => 0 [associated] => [topicname] => EmotionalPoetry )
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