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Array
(
[sid] => 51551
[catid] => 1
[aid] => mick
[title] => Unknown Broken Heart
[time] => 2004-06-12 10:20:58
[hometext] =>
[bodytext] => It is sad when a stranger can break your heart. It is sad when someone that you don't even know can me you feel so badly. The pain that you feel upon that rejection makes you contemplate suicide. You think that if no one can love you, what is the point? Rejection, the worst form of hurt, slams you like a wrecking ball in the chest. It destroys your heart; you never want to experience vulnerability again. You feel that stab, where your stranger has stuck the knife. You wonder whether the gash can be repaired, you know that it was already there. Your stranger only re-opened the wound; re-exposing it to the hurt that you have felt for so long. You already hurt yourself, you hate yourself. This is just more to add to the pile, more knives to shove in when you have that wave of depression again. Just one more reason that you aren't perfect, just one more way that another person can push you away. That is what you need for your already tortured existance. It is because of your convictions that you can't just end it. It is because of your resolve that you continue to exist. You refuse to love, so you continue to live with the pain. A single rejection can push you over the edge. It is after so much previous pain that this happens. And when you soar through the emptiness; you realize that you have control. You can control the way that you feel because you know you shouldn't care. But then you do care, you care so much that you want to withdraw from the world; be alone for the rest of your life. You want to be invisible, never noticed by anyone again. You start to think that absence of interaction can lead to absence of pain. But this is like the cutter, slicing their skin to displace the pain. They explain that it makes them feel better. Neither makes it go away, nothing is resolved. The only end is death, death to it all. Existing in the emptiness of your heart, you wait for it. That is your only resolution, the natural ending; because you cannot take your own life. [comments] => 1 [counter] => 153 [topic] => 13 [informant] => DragonLuvSong [notes] => [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => english [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 5 [ratings] => 1 [editpoem] => 1 [associated] => [topicname] => DarkPoetry )
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