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Array ( [sid] => 57819 [catid] => 1 [aid] => mick [title] => Scars of Promise [time] => 2004-07-27 20:39:42 [hometext] => The scars of promise let me live each time the metal touched skin.... [bodytext] => Scars of Promise

This is a promise
I intend to keep
To live another day
Despite the pain
Inside of me

Every promise before
Was broken to the floor
Despite how hard I tried
To keep them in spite
Despite how I never cried
Because I couldn't handle life

Appearances are deceiving
These scars never bled
There was nothing left
Inside of me to come to surface
These scars never bled
But that doesn't mean
I never had a purpose
Each time the metal touched skin
I am bloodless without sin
I have no heart to repent with
Each time the metal touched skin
The scars of promise let me live
Each time the metal touched skin [comments] => 5 [counter] => 177 [topic] => 13 [informant] => essentially9 [notes] => [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => english [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 4 [ratings] => 1 [editpoem] => 1 [associated] => [topicname] => DarkPoetry )

Scars of Promise

Contributed by essentially9 on Tuesday, 27th July 2004 @ 08:39:42 PM in AEST
Topic: DarkPoetry

Scars of Promise

This is a promise
I intend to keep
To live another day
Despite the pain
Inside of me

Every promise before
Was broken to the floor
Despite how hard I tried
To keep them in spite
Despite how I never cried
Because I couldn't handle life

Appearances are deceiving
These scars never bled
There was nothing left
Inside of me to come to surface
These scars never bled
But that doesn't mean
I never had a purpose
Each time the metal touched skin
I am bloodless without sin
I have no heart to repent with
Each time the metal touched skin
The scars of promise let me live
Each time the metal touched skin

Copyright © essentially9 ... [ 2004-07-27 20:39:42]
(Date/Time posted on site)

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Re: Scars of Promise (User Rating: 1 )
by TheVoice on Tuesday, 27th July 2004 @ 09:11:41 PM AEST
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strong write. the scars on the inside hurt more than those on the outside. my wishes for you to have them removed.

the voice

Re: Scars of Promise (User Rating: 1 )
by waos on Tuesday, 27th July 2004 @ 09:13:20 PM AEST
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that's really good, like i really liked it. i can relate cause i'm a cutter and those things seem so true. i love the line "these scars never bled"

Re: Scars of Promise (User Rating: 1 )
by theMoth on Tuesday, 27th July 2004 @ 09:59:24 PM AEST
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I liked the imagery in that last chunk. Groovy.--the Moth

Re: Scars of Promise (User Rating: 1 )
by nexxa on Wednesday, 28th July 2004 @ 01:54:02 AM AEST
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Ok this one surprised me do I read it word for word or look for the deeper meaning?
As for structure I like it as well its a little different and I think maybe adding some punctuation and line breaks could make an interesting revision.
Nicely done wee one
Nexxa

Re: Scars of Promise (User Rating: 1 )
by pixie on Wednesday, 28th July 2004 @ 05:46:10 AM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)

very good poem....full of expression and sadness *hugs you*

takecare,

pixie xx

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