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Array
(
[sid] => 62599
[catid] => 1
[aid] => mick
[title] => ''The Truth Of Our Lovely Home!''
[time] => 2004-09-05 04:21:48
[hometext] => When I wrote this I was more desprest then I am now. I don’t think the pain has gone for good but I haven’t been feeling as bad as I used to be. So there’s not much for my family to pick up on, but I guess if I snapped again then they still wouldn't
[bodytext] => Morning has pasted, And noon is here. ... And here I sit, But I don't feel fears. They don't get me in the day. 'Coz the day's my life. Night is the time, When the monsters take flight. But in the day, My feelings rise. ... In my suicide notes. And with my lonesome cries. Some days I’m lucky, Some days I do feel warm. But then for ever after, I always just feel torn. It’s crazy how my life works, But I’m more mad my-self. That’s why people call me crazy, And I’m always put down under mental health. But they don't see my feelings... And they don't feel my pain. And I bet if they had to live this way... Then THEY too, would turn emotionally insane. What’s a happy surrounding? When there's living-dead, in your head? And what about when your head is pounding, Because you've nothing to spill red? And when you're brought home, Still they don't notice you're hurting! Mum just knows I’m suicidal. So she asks the questions, and some times starts cursing. But just ignoring, Quite how I might feeling. 'Coz it's all about her! She stops me from healing...! Then, the next day, All is well. Well that's what they like to think, Despite that fact I live in hell...! What is this family of mine? They close their eyes, Hide the lies, Ignore the pain, I have inside! They expect me, To be alright! And not in my wildest dreams, Want to die. They tell all others, That I’m loved. Which isn't a cover, But I DON'T WANT TO BE HUGGED!!!!! They pitch a world around me, Place a swimming pool in the grounds of our home. But then some times ignore me. When I cry all alone. They’re too scared to admit, This daughter that they own! Why can't they except this sh*t! "The truth of our lovely home!" They better start soon, 'Coz I’m gonna make it soon well known! I mean it! They love me, but I’m always ALONE! [comments] => 1 [counter] => 167 [topic] => 48 [informant] => deathdrop [notes] => [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => english [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 5 [ratings] => 1 [editpoem] => 1 [associated] => [topicname] => EmotionalPoetry )
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