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Array
(
[sid] => 62989
[catid] => 1
[aid] => mick
[title] => I LIVE INSIDE MY STAIN!
[time] => 2004-09-08 11:12:21
[hometext] => This one is taken from my book, ‘BLACK SUICIDE!’ The whole idea of my book was that when it’s finished then I will kill my-self, and then my book will record why I did it, instead reading of leaving a suicide note… but now that my book is almost finished,
[bodytext] => ...I don’t know how much I want to die… ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ I forgot about the great soreness, From after you shred. And I forgot about the confusion, That I always used to get. And now that I’ve got it back, I feel so dead. …. And I’m so numbed up, That I haven’t eaten yet… And for some other reason, I keep on getting pumped up with tears. I don’t cry, I just hold in those ‘BLACK’ fears… I can’t move my arm too much, Because it really hurts! I’ve been keeping it all clean and stuff, To remove all the excess dirt… But one final last thing, That’s kept solid in my mind, Is that, when I’ve finished this, I’ve promised my-self, I’ll walk away and commit suicide! Mike, really did my head in! He says that I’m just playing games!! So when I die, mike! Read this book! And then you’ll get why I’m in pain! “I AM TWISTED!” “I AM MUCKED!” … AND THE TRUTH WILL ALWAYS REMAIN!! “I AM BROKEN”, “AND MY LIFE SUCKS”, BECAUSE I live, INSIDE MY STAIN!! [comments] => 5 [counter] => 231 [topic] => 36 [informant] => deathdrop [notes] => [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => english [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 5 [ratings] => 2 [editpoem] => 1 [associated] => [topicname] => Suicide )
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