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Array ( [sid] => 64305 [catid] => 1 [aid] => mick [title] => I’m still stained from the memories touch! [time] => 2004-09-19 04:47:32 [hometext] => I had more night mares last night… only they weren’t, because these things really happened! And now, 2 1/2 months on, I still live with the stained memory! PLEASE COMMENT ON MY WORK!!!! [bodytext] => This shadow,
Still remains.
In an unbeatable force,
It’s stuck to my brain!

Last night,
Was a night mare’s trip again.
I saw my past,
In my dusty threads.
I saw me dead,
In a hospital bed.
And Graham telling me,
I’m not mad in my head…

I found me the roof,
Of the multi-story car park.
And Jason was there,
Showing me, the scars down his arm…
And Jason holding me back,
Saying “it’s no way to join the stars”
And me turning black.
Because he kept me in his arms…

Jason standing with me,
Holding me tight.
It felt so good to have him there,
Telling me it was all alright…

But then when the coppers came,
And they yanked back my slit wrists.
Pulled up my sleeves and looked at it,
And then put hand cuffs to my fists.
Then they dragged me bleeding,
Down 6 flight of stairs,
… And then Jason disappeared,
Because he didn’t really care…

…Then I find me a month later,
Down in town again.
And I remember seeing Jason,
Which screwed up all my head!
And then we started talking,
And he asked me how I’d been.
And I’d given up cutting,
So I said I was ‘coming clean’.
… Then later on that day,
I went on the roof again!
And cried until I had a silver face
And then I went and sat on the edge…
And then I wrote my suicide note,
Saying how I hated Jason so much!
But when security came,
So I came down at once.
Why did I do that?
I why didn’t I jump?
‘Coz then Jason came up,
And told me how I’m loved…
It would have been so easy to jump it!
It wouldn’t have taken much!
But I came down, and got arrested…
… And I’m still stained by the memories touch!
[comments] => 4 [counter] => 155 [topic] => 36 [informant] => deathdrop [notes] => [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => english [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 10 [ratings] => 2 [editpoem] => 1 [associated] => [topicname] => Suicide )
I’m still stained from the memories touch!

Contributed by deathdrop on Sunday, 19th September 2004 @ 04:47:32 AM in AEST
Topic: Suicide



This shadow,
Still remains.
In an unbeatable force,
It’s stuck to my brain!

Last night,
Was a night mare’s trip again.
I saw my past,
In my dusty threads.
I saw me dead,
In a hospital bed.
And Graham telling me,
I’m not mad in my head…

I found me the roof,
Of the multi-story car park.
And Jason was there,
Showing me, the scars down his arm…
And Jason holding me back,
Saying “it’s no way to join the stars”
And me turning black.
Because he kept me in his arms…

Jason standing with me,
Holding me tight.
It felt so good to have him there,
Telling me it was all alright…

But then when the coppers came,
And they yanked back my slit wrists.
Pulled up my sleeves and looked at it,
And then put hand cuffs to my fists.
Then they dragged me bleeding,
Down 6 flight of stairs,
… And then Jason disappeared,
Because he didn’t really care…

…Then I find me a month later,
Down in town again.
And I remember seeing Jason,
Which screwed up all my head!
And then we started talking,
And he asked me how I’d been.
And I’d given up cutting,
So I said I was ‘coming clean’.
… Then later on that day,
I went on the roof again!
And cried until I had a silver face
And then I went and sat on the edge…
And then I wrote my suicide note,
Saying how I hated Jason so much!
But when security came,
So I came down at once.
Why did I do that?
I why didn’t I jump?
‘Coz then Jason came up,
And told me how I’m loved…
It would have been so easy to jump it!
It wouldn’t have taken much!
But I came down, and got arrested…
… And I’m still stained by the memories touch!




Copyright © deathdrop ... [ 2004-09-19 04:47:32]
(Date/Time posted on site)





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Re: I’m still stained from the memories touch! (User Rating: 1 )
by all4jesus_teen on Sunday, 19th September 2004 @ 05:00:13 AM AEST
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Wow. So deep and meaningful. Extremely sad. I will pray for you.
Steph


Re: I’m still stained from the memories touch! (User Rating: 1 )
by inoc on Sunday, 19th September 2004 @ 05:03:48 AM AEST
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Fantastic work Deathdrop!!!
I'm sorry this wasn't only a nightmare
but I think Jason does love you the way I read it.....I think if you stick with him he will look after you...is that what other YPDC readers think too?
cheers!


Re: I’m still stained from the memories touch! (User Rating: 1 )
by lostinmyself on Sunday, 19th September 2004 @ 06:56:28 AM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)
Nightmares are awful, i know.
But they are worse when there is truth behind them.
I hope you find some sort of peace too.
Oh...and it doeas seem that this Jason has some sort of feeling for you.
much love and hugs,
Phil xxx


Re: I’m still stained from the memories touch! (User Rating: 1 )
by brew on Sunday, 19th September 2004 @ 12:05:28 PM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)
Dreams are the sub-concious, letting you know. Deep and emotional I must say.




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