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Array
(
[sid] => 67409
[catid] => 1
[aid] => mick
[title] => but what if i can't?
[time] => 2004-10-14 12:36:08
[hometext] =>
[bodytext] => i been thinkin maybe i could begin again build myself from the bottom up you know? and start with just me i've cried too much over him so much i feel i'm permanently blue i've felt my world crumble over and over and over again can i stand this time though he's paralyzed me can i breathe this time though his hand is around my neck can i see this time if i don't get it right he'll be the reason i fade and i fear that one day i'll just lose this fight too many times i begged him to be my saviour the one who would take me away away from the pain but HE he was the one who supplied the pills to keep me keep me addicted and i'm ashamed now i've overdossed can't walk without it can't sleep if i ain't got him i've failed this test and i'm scared that i'll fail it again can i walk away this time even though my knees tremble can i breathe this time though he's grasping my throat swearing that he loves me but would kill me before it crossed his mind... to just let me go yea i been thinkin maybe i could begin again build myself from the bottom up you know? and start with just me.... BUT WHAT IF I CAN'T.... [comments] => 0 [counter] => 186 [topic] => 61 [informant] => taintedorange21 [notes] => [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => english [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 0 [ratings] => 0 [editpoem] => 1 [associated] => [topicname] => selfstruggles )
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