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Array
(
[sid] => 75073
[catid] => 1
[aid] => mick
[title] => If I Were Stronger This Wouldn't Be A Problem
[time] => 2004-12-09 17:21:10
[hometext] => I wish I could forget
[bodytext] => My dear sweet Jen,
How I long to see your beautiful face again,
Satin blue eyes and electric smile.
What can I do,
I was supposed to love you.
Tearing away at my gut,
This feeling of lonesome and loath.
For the men in your life now, aren't me,
Theives all of them.
How dare they eat from my table!!!
Stealing a smile from you,
Pressing the matter until flesh meets flesh.
I vomit to think what you do behind closed doors,
If it were only me,
But it will never and can never be that again.
You have moved on and I was left to die.
My heart left without me and so I bleed.
I bleed over our memories, the flowers, the grave.
Letting everything I once associated with love vanish.
Washing my hands in this red water,
Pulling up my innards and organs.
Asking the questions I don't want answers to,
Hoping to hear you say, I want you back, I love you.
I ache for that day, but it will never appear.
It will never come back,
Fleeing away into the hollows and dark.
So I sit here, with my moth, my own dillusion.
Killing the pain just enough, just enough.
So when I almost forget, you are there again, smiling.
[comments] => 7
[counter] => 268
[topic] => 24
[informant] => deadreckoning1983
[notes] =>
[ihome] => 0
[alanguage] => english
[acomm] => 0
[haspoll] => 0
[pollID] => 0
[score] => 15
[ratings] => 3
[editpoem] => 1
[associated] =>
[topicname] => LoveRemembered
)
If I Were Stronger This Wouldn't Be A Problem
Contributed by
deadreckoning1983
on
Thursday, 9th December 2004 @ 05:21:10 PM in AEST
Topic:
LoveRemembered
|
My dear sweet Jen,
How I long to see your beautiful face again,
Satin blue eyes and electric smile.
What can I do,
I was supposed to love you.
Tearing away at my gut,
This feeling of lonesome and loath.
For the men in your life now, aren't me,
Theives all of them.
How dare they eat from my table!!!
Stealing a smile from you,
Pressing the matter until flesh meets flesh.
I vomit to think what you do behind closed doors,
If it were only me,
But it will never and can never be that again.
You have moved on and I was left to die.
My heart left without me and so I bleed.
I bleed over our memories, the flowers, the grave.
Letting everything I once associated with love vanish.
Washing my hands in this red water,
Pulling up my innards and organs.
Asking the questions I don't want answers to,
Hoping to hear you say, I want you back, I love you.
I ache for that day, but it will never appear.
It will never come back,
Fleeing away into the hollows and dark.
So I sit here, with my moth, my own dillusion.
Killing the pain just enough, just enough.
So when I almost forget, you are there again, smiling.
Copyright ©
deadreckoning1983
... [
2004-12-09 17:21:10]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: If I Were Stronger This Wouldn't Be A Problem
(User Rating: 1 )
by pixie on
Thursday, 9th December 2004 @ 05:23:11 PM AEST
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Info | Send
a Message)
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you will become strong, give yourself time, a very pained write,
pixie xx |
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Re: If I Were Stronger This Wouldn't Be A Problem
(User Rating: 1 )
by theMoth on
Thursday, 9th December 2004 @ 06:40:45 PM AEST
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a Message)
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Very introspective, Shemp.
Did you mean to say
"I sit here with my moth"
or "my mouth"?
What's her number?
--Mothy |
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Re: If I Were Stronger This Wouldn't Be A Problem
(User Rating: 1 )
by Nazmythian on
Thursday, 9th December 2004 @ 07:44:23 PM AEST
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Info | Send
a Message)
|
Oh boy that hurt. I recall such despair. Dane, that was incredibly painful to read. It took me back to images and memories I thought locked away forever. Impressive. It does get easier ... it really does.
Nazzy ~
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Re: If I Were Stronger This Wouldn't Be A Problem
(User Rating: 1 )
by Silent-No-More on
Thursday, 9th December 2004 @ 08:05:39 PM AEST
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a Message)
|
Gosh... this, I think... is raw, real, honest emotion set out on the page. It is terribly moving. I'm seriously impressed with your williness to share this, Dane. Incredible.
Impressed,
~SNM~ |
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Re: If I Were Stronger This Wouldn't Be A Problem
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Thursday, 9th December 2004 @ 10:57:01 PM AEST
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a Message)
|
Awe, sweet Dane, I know the tortured hell of which you speak.
This was a very powerful write and you are much stronger than
even you realize. Why, just by sharing this, you have
shown enormous strength. I don't know that I could, were I you.
But the emotions you have evoked in me are strong. Eating away
at my conscience little by little. You do well to draw this out
of your reader. Excellent right, my friend!
Once again, I am thrilled to be reading your work.
~Breezy |
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Re: If I Were Stronger This Wouldn't Be A Problem
(User Rating: 1 )
by eyesxcriedxout1989 on
Friday, 10th December 2004 @ 05:29:53 PM AEST
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a Message)
|
Dane, man, this almost brought me to tears...So tragic is thou hardship...What hast ye done to deserve this...hmmm...You did an amazing job on this, to make me see that emotion, and I really felt where you where coming from on the whole thing...Excellent...completely excellent
Mason |
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Re: If I Were Stronger This Wouldn't Be A Problem
(User Rating: 1 )
by hauntedscorp on
Monday, 3rd November 2014 @ 01:49:08 PM AEST
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Info | Send
a Message)
|
I could get lost in this poem for awhile...You expressed your thoughts very well. Deep ending, really exposed, and a tough spot to be. Here is my favourite part, while it may not be the most poetic, the emotion bites into the flesh:
How dare they eat from my table!!!"
Oh man. It sucks when a loved one moves on.
Great job with this!
~Scorp |
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