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Array
(
[sid] => 81605
[catid] => 1
[aid] => mick
[title] => Suicide
[time] => 2005-01-26 16:11:20
[hometext] => I have been suicidal for a while and I have been expressing myself.
[bodytext] => I've Been Popping Pills, Hoping it Kills. Thinking about life, Maybe I should use a knife. Wishing I was dead, But you might all dread. No one is stopping me, You all can see. I want to stop this pain, But who's to blame? This terrible feeling, That isn't heeling. I Love this guy, But it seems he wants me to die. People think they know me, But what is it that they see? Do you think I would do this? Am I someone that you would miss? Well let's think about it, And I Take another hit. I feel so weird and I'm going crazy, Feeling like I need 100 pills to make me lazy. I grab a hand full, now I'm popping pills Still hoping it kills. All the sudden I get this stabbing pain, That no one can tame. I start to scream but nothing comes out, Can anyone hear me shout? My mind is racing, I start going crazy start pacing. Wondering If I should end it all, And just take the fall. Maybe If I wait, I could just go with him on one more date. But I think it's too late, I can't wait. The pain is cutting me deep, And all I need is to sleep. I know I won't wake up here, But maybe I'll wake up there. I didn't try and I fell, So I think I'm going to Hell. People think my life is just all great, They think I just love and don't hate. They look at me say she's stuck up, But I'm just ***** up. I cry and shed all these tears, But if I do this, it'll end all my fears. What if I survive? Then In Heaven Or Hell I won't arrive. I stop and think about that guy, Would he care if I were to die? I feel like he doesn't love me, Is that the way it has to be? Do I have a choice? I would love to hear his voice. I'm just going to stab at my wrist, before that I'm going to write down who I love on a list. Well I made up my mind, And I'm not going to look behind. Tell mom and daddy I love them, And It wasn't them it was him. [comments] => 4 [counter] => 216 [topic] => 36 [informant] => punk_grill [notes] => [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => english [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 0 [ratings] => 0 [editpoem] => 1 [associated] => [topicname] => Suicide )
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