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Array
(
[sid] => 81614
[catid] => 1
[aid] => mick
[title] => Sincerity
[time] => 2005-01-26 17:54:46
[hometext] => I wrote this with the simple desire of putting onto paper the fact that I can be very shallow in front of people. I rarely care about anything said or done, and nobody's seen me the way I want them to. The real me isn't around enough. Critiques invited
[bodytext] => I take up space, but what for? I use what I have for wrong. So clean on the top, but rot inside, My entire life is a lie. I want to feel, I want to live My life with someone else, Who can complete the void inside, And make me feel again. How can I find the one I need To wipe clean my dirty slate, To bring me around to a desire inside That will bring me happiness indeed? I’m not sincere, but say that I am. I change emotions like clothes. For in my mind, I carry inside Empty, plain, and pathetic thoughts. A side of me will demonstrate Every so often its rage That its voice remains trapped deep inside, And is never heard by choice. I’ve lost control of myself, I have no aid To bring my emotions in check, For all the things released from deep inside Are angry and nothing more. The feelings I show are manufactured to give The appearance of a human within, Yet, I cannot hide what is deep inside. From all, from none, from me. I know when I’m real, but rarely ever am, It’s a longing I feel so strong. That I can bring to light what’s inside To someone willing to see. Emotions I hold, and within they stay Never to be released to one Whom I love; or want to inside A burden to bear on my heart. They’ll see me one day, And that day I fear, For my true colours will appear To one undeserving, Yet to me so near, Remember these words: “I’m never sincere, Until I can’t speak without drawing a tear.” [comments] => 4 [counter] => 150 [topic] => 48 [informant] => fielding88 [notes] => [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => english [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 10 [ratings] => 2 [editpoem] => 1 [associated] => [topicname] => EmotionalPoetry )
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