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Array ( [sid] => 97030 [catid] => 1 [aid] => mick [title] => beyond the prison walls [time] => 2005-06-06 11:11:32 [hometext] => For those that don't know me, have always been know as a happy soul, but beneath it all am really a depression stuffer and have been struggling with it for years. Am sure all those who are like me can relate to this poem. [bodytext] => Underneath the laughing character
Lied a sense of deep depression,
Hidden secrets that no one knows,
Is Beneath the happy facial expression
Am really dwelling within myself.


Years of trying medications,
My mind, that threat, has not yet been cured
Years of trying therapies,
My soul and heart, that bled, are still not lured
Am still beyond the prison walls.


Days, hours and minutes are wasted,
Withdraws by endless sleeping,
My mind and body always so tired
Lacking of energy, am always weeping,
After all life should be lived full.


The pain and sadness bottled up inside me
Refusing to disappear, making me want to flare,
Pushing away my dearest, causing them to tears,
Since suffering is too much for them to bare
Am still beyond the prison walls.


Where do I find an axe to break down these walls?
How do I get out the darkness of prison?
Am like a prisoner behind the barriers bars?
Coz mentally, daylight so far had not been risen,
I truly pray, someday, I find the brightness at the end of the tunnel.
[comments] => 5 [counter] => 166 [topic] => 61 [informant] => rosethorn100 [notes] => [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => english [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 10 [ratings] => 2 [editpoem] => 1 [associated] => [topicname] => selfstruggles )
beyond the prison walls

Contributed by rosethorn100 on Monday, 6th June 2005 @ 11:11:32 AM in AEST
Topic: selfstruggles



Underneath the laughing character
Lied a sense of deep depression,
Hidden secrets that no one knows,
Is Beneath the happy facial expression
Am really dwelling within myself.


Years of trying medications,
My mind, that threat, has not yet been cured
Years of trying therapies,
My soul and heart, that bled, are still not lured
Am still beyond the prison walls.


Days, hours and minutes are wasted,
Withdraws by endless sleeping,
My mind and body always so tired
Lacking of energy, am always weeping,
After all life should be lived full.


The pain and sadness bottled up inside me
Refusing to disappear, making me want to flare,
Pushing away my dearest, causing them to tears,
Since suffering is too much for them to bare
Am still beyond the prison walls.


Where do I find an axe to break down these walls?
How do I get out the darkness of prison?
Am like a prisoner behind the barriers bars?
Coz mentally, daylight so far had not been risen,
I truly pray, someday, I find the brightness at the end of the tunnel.




Copyright © rosethorn100 ... [ 2005-06-06 11:11:32]
(Date/Time posted on site)





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Re: beyond the prison walls (User Rating: 1 )
by Stellar on Monday, 6th June 2005 @ 11:46:27 AM AEST
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I too have suffered with depression all my life and I've been fighting it for the last 5 years.
Sleep was always my escape and still is.
I'm not yet at the end of the battle myself, but I've come along way. So believe me when I say it does get better.

Take care and God bless!
Lizzie


Re: beyond the prison walls (User Rating: 1 )
by vibes2go on Monday, 6th June 2005 @ 01:08:23 PM AEST
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very well written. I am on my third or fourth .. trial of meds .. my wrists are still sore and swollen from my last suicide attempt because .. well the meds don't seem to work for me. I think I know you from another site .. I suffer from a lot of other disorders that I can't be treated for because I have tonic/clonic seizures .. even the depression meds interfere ... some friends don't understand and can't cope with my behavior. I never really judge any behavior except cruelty .. I don't think cruelty is ever warrented .. One thing about depression.. it makes really great writers. We're able to write from our great depths, and our joy when we feel that .. sorry for the ... way I go on... good job any way ...
mary


Re: beyond the prison walls (User Rating: 1 )
by xXx_Fem_Fatale_xXx on Monday, 6th June 2005 @ 03:09:00 PM AEST
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Rosey, good poem girl....its good ya letting ya emotions go out with the poems. Will be a great healing point for you. Huggssssss girl, love you dearly and I'll always be here for you.
You're like a sister to me. :-)

Hugggssss,

Nats.


Re: beyond the prison walls (User Rating: 1 )
by Puppy_dog_eyes on Tuesday, 7th June 2005 @ 07:28:51 PM AEST
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I think those that know you well will feel your pain through these words.
Those that perhaps don't and see you only as a smiling face will realise now what lifes behind the smile
Good work

Steve


Re: beyond the prison walls (User Rating: 1 )
by Dorkfish on Monday, 20th June 2005 @ 02:48:29 PM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)
Hey, been there before. Sorry you feel that way. Good writing though!!!!




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