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temporal realm

Contributed by ladyfawn on Sunday, 12th July 2015 @ 10:53:55 PM in AEST
Topic: surreal















he stood in the abandoned castle in the dark
looking out the windows as he heard the lark
sat there in the ancient castle on hill of high
dog lay at his feet as he gave most heavy sigh,

he slowly leaned back his eyes closed in sleep
of another time another place- into dreams deep
walls of ruin held secrets from days long gone
dreaming of blackbirds- heard a girl in her song,

she sang- as the notes carried a desolate tune
she became a nightbird and flew to the moon
the chair leaned back and crashed to the floor
eyes opened in alarm- this same castle no more,

yet wait- though the walls were the same style
fire in the hearth had been burning for a while
oh- what magic was this swirling around his head
he yelled and stomped a foot to see was he dead.

* *
*|*














Copyright © ladyfawn ... [ 2015-07-12 22:53:55]
(Date/Time posted on site)





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Re: temporal realm (User Rating: 1 )
by ingeniusidiot on Monday, 13th July 2015 @ 08:55:44 AM AEST
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Interesting piece. yet another good write. Im getting to really enjoy reading your work.

Rich


Re: temporal realm (User Rating: 1 )
by JamesStockdale on Monday, 13th July 2015 @ 10:10:25 AM AEST
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Beautiful!
My kind of poem.
For a moment there I was really there.
Spectacular.

James


Re: temporal realm (User Rating: 1 )
by Beyfoxman5 on Monday, 13th July 2015 @ 10:31:12 AM AEST
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A great painting, powerful. I was right in that place as I read it.

Fox


Re: temporal realm (User Rating: 1 )
by Jenni_K on Monday, 13th July 2015 @ 02:38:23 PM AEST
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Once again, my dear friend, you have painted such a vivid picture with your words... Thanks for sharing on FB... Hugs and woofies...


Re: temporal realm (User Rating: 1 )
by irisblue on Monday, 13th July 2015 @ 08:09:18 PM AEST
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intriguing and magical I love this!


Re: temporal realm (User Rating: 1 )
by speedy on Monday, 13th July 2015 @ 08:53:24 PM AEST
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Great write.

Hannah B


Re: temporal realm (User Rating: 1 )
by joydeep_nath on Tuesday, 14th July 2015 @ 12:59:21 PM AEST
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nice intriguing write..


Re: temporal realm (User Rating: 1 )
by xHeathenx on Tuesday, 14th July 2015 @ 04:50:41 PM AEST
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Nicely done Nessa. :)

The picture here and how it is portrayed is terrifically done.
i often don't use words of single syllables to end my lines because I feel I can't properly convey my message, but what I like about your writing, especially here, is that the picture placed within the poem is nothing short of vivid, lively, and intense.

All the best,
-Mark


Re: temporal realm (User Rating: 1 )
by hauntedscorp on Thursday, 16th July 2015 @ 12:15:13 PM AEST
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I love this new chapter in your writing...Exquisite! Reading this poem I am so intrigued to explore more about this mysterious man and all that haunts him.


~Scorp


Re: temporal realm (User Rating: 1 )
by Invierno on Friday, 17th July 2015 @ 07:24:09 PM AEST
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So very nice to read you again. I've missed coming on here, and you are a primary reason.

My best to you,

Invierno


Re: temporal realm (User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on Saturday, 18th July 2015 @ 02:19:18 PM AEST
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The castle may have been a ruin, but he wasn't dead. He still hears that blackbird, and her song. Beautiful, truly. x


Re: temporal realm (User Rating: 1 )
by Lydthon15 on Sunday, 19th July 2015 @ 09:00:19 PM AEST
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The imagery in this poem is amazing. It gives you this otherworldly feeling.Great write.


Re: temporal realm (User Rating: 1 )
by Puppy_dog_eyes on Saturday, 25th July 2015 @ 04:37:44 PM AEST
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Yet again I was drawn in to the mesmerising imagery that is always a feature of your poetry.
Yet again I was not disappointed to read the words and imagine the scene that you have so skillfully created
Gave me a sense of inner peace reading this

Great work

Steve


Re: temporal realm (User Rating: 1 )
by Archie on Wednesday, 29th July 2015 @ 03:34:26 AM AEST
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This gives me ideas for my own story (Romero's Quest). You have a great imagination and a very pleasing style.

I am writing a story, a history of a people. I had taken a break from it but your write has sparked inspiration.




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