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Limits On Breathing

Contributed by invierno on Sunday, 4th December 2016 @ 11:14:54 AM in AEST
Topic: spiritual

Smooth or ragged
even or jagged

breathing is living
whether taking or giving

grasping to keep seeing
extracts a toll on your being

there is no price worth paying
to just keep on staying

to surrender your soul
for another breath

yields an empty bowl
upon your inevitable death.

Copyright © invierno ... [ 2016-12-04 11:14:54]
(Date/Time posted on site)


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Re: Limits On Breathing (User Rating: 1 )
by ming on Sunday, 4th December 2016 @ 01:43:46 PM AEST
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Very nice rhyming Going on here!


Re: Limits On Breathing (User Rating: 1 )
by JamesStockdale on Sunday, 4th December 2016 @ 05:02:47 PM AEST
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Great flow and rhyming.
Well done!


Re: Limits On Breathing (User Rating: 1 )
by hauntedscorp on Monday, 5th December 2016 @ 11:09:02 AM AEST
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While I hesitate to venture what inspired such a morose piece, I cannot overlook the perfection in this write. Great job!

I hope all is well with you.


Re: Limits On Breathing (User Rating: 1 )
by softerware on Monday, 5th December 2016 @ 10:33:48 PM AEST
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Let us not go quietly. The night is not gentle, and there is much to do before we deserve to abandon ship. Had I three lifetimes, I could not do all that I need to.
I agree that playing poker with the devil is playing against the house. A stacked deck. Not worth yet one more breath.
A word of advice to the lost, disguised as self surrender, spun on a delicate premise.
The message is clear; the motive is ambiguous.
The music of your words is lovely to read out loud.
A haunting composition. softerware

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