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Array ( [sid] => 184588 [catid] => 1 [aid] => mick [title] => I am still here [time] => 2017-10-23 23:09:19 [hometext] => We are born of love; love is our mother. ~Rumi [bodytext] => but she is not
every locked door
has a key
how to unlock
grief
to step into
the trail of
tears
broken down
no crying
fear
lose so much
not be able
to undrown
or breathe
or talk
or explain
that empty
is its own
wail. [comments] => 4 [counter] => 299 [topic] => 73 [informant] => ming [notes] => [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => english [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 0 [ratings] => 0 [editpoem] => 1 [associated] => [topicname] => abstract )
I am still here

Contributed by ming on Monday, 23rd October 2017 @ 11:09:19 PM in AEST
Topic: abstract



but she is not
every locked door
has a key
how to unlock
grief
to step into
the trail of
tears
broken down
no crying
fear
lose so much
not be able
to undrown
or breathe
or talk
or explain
that empty
is its own
wail.




Copyright © ming ... [ 2017-10-23 23:09:19]
(Date/Time posted on site)





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Re: I am still here (User Rating: 1 )
by softerware on Thursday, 26th October 2017 @ 05:31:48 PM AEST
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Where to begin?
EVERY LOCKED DOOR HAS A KEY!
You have taken away our excuse to fail.
NOT BE ABLE TO UNDROWN.
Once we acknowledge our sorrow; she owns us.
EMPTY IS ITS ON WAIL.
Absence of our senses, we must abdicate our humanity. We are feeling creatures.
Without the brain to reason and prioritize, our emotions would tear us limb from limb.
Your poem brings love to be judged so that it cannot destroy us.
You have given us eloquent permission to fall.
softerware


Re: I am still here (User Rating: 1 )
by xHeathenx on Friday, 27th October 2017 @ 02:15:22 AM AEST
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I like softerware/'/s comments, and I/'/ll say one of my own.

"Empty is its own wail"

First I read that as "wall", but saw it in the comment and came back, and I couldn/'/t agree more. The important part that I relate to in that statement, has been the fact that my response to not being able to have what I want throughout the years has been rejection, much in how Nietzsche criticized Wagner for praising abdtinence, for he comments that when we can/'/t have something we want, we would rather want nothing than to accept it.

I likened it in my own head to a child throwing a tempet tantrum, but after the tantrum, the resentment in the child/'/s head and heart says "no" to everything it loves on any other occasion. It/'/s a sort of hope that in our despair, that which we so desperately seek will see our pain and say "Now that I know you want me, I will come to you."

Well done :)


Re: I am still here (User Rating: 1 )
by JamesStockdale on Friday, 27th October 2017 @ 05:35:49 PM AEST
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Again Jaye and Heathen summed this up well.
Very uniquely too!!!


Re: I am still here (User Rating: 1 )
by Breezy on Wednesday, 1st November 2017 @ 09:08:52 PM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)
Oh wow! superb! The depth in this could destroy
a heart! I love all of it, but most especially the
last few lines ....

//"not be able
to undrown"/
/

How incredible! Such power in so short a phrase!
Magnificent writing. Truly. ^_^


~ Breezy





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