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Array
(
[sid] => 186852
[catid] => 1
[aid] => mick
[title] => ChristianGay
[time] => 2020-02-19 19:52:22
[hometext] => Written Before I came out to Myself- I am so happy I finally did. And I understand that God is not angry or disappointed. God knew before I did.
[bodytext] => Questions and confusion occupy my day worrying about what the world might say. My fingers ripping out my hair, I need to pray, but do I dare? Confession takes its time to form building up inside, a raging storm. Wanting release at this pivotal time begging to keep my dimming sublime. I never thought I’d feel this way* Death to all who know my plight my life is judged without a fight- weight of the world is crushing me damned to hell, for eternity? Hearing sounds- a ticking clock mind and soul began taking stock I want to live my life right now! To God above, I will pledge my vow. I was never raised to be this way* Hands quiver as I reach to feel forbidden fruit that I know will heal all the pain that is cloaked in me knowing unconditional love will declare me free. Grabbing hold my yearning lust hoping I will learn to trust the nature God has granted me away from it- I will no longer flee. I never wanted to be this way* But I Am. It Is Me. [comments] => 2 [counter] => 104 [topic] => 48 [informant] => n2dep2care [notes] => [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => english [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 0 [ratings] => 0 [editpoem] => 1 [associated] => [topicname] => EmotionalPoetry )
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