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No way out
Contributed by
strwbrrystrbrst0225
on
Wednesday, 20th July 2005 @ 12:16:41 PM in AEST
Topic:
oops
|
I dont need to know you
I never wanted to care
But youve broken into me
And I found youve become a part of me
This wasnt what I wanted
But I couldnt give it up
Id never thought Id find it
But found everything in you.
You pushed until I pulled
I screamed until I cried
This frustrated hate ,
Ashes of love
This dust is all there is of my soul
But you found your way in ,
And I gave you my heart
Now theres no way out.
Copyright ©
strwbrrystrbrst0225
... [
2005-07-20 12:16:41]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: No way out
(User Rating: 1 )
by lil_angel on
Wednesday, 20th July 2005 @ 01:09:55 PM AEST
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a Message)
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| This is a good write. Just a couple of peices of advice...most people in here shy away from poets that beg for comments in thier explantion of the poem. |
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Re: No way out
(User Rating: 1 )
by lil_angel on
Wednesday, 20th July 2005 @ 01:13:51 PM AEST
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| This is an alright write, i would suggest that you dont beg for comments, people tend to overlook poems that the author begs for them. |
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Re: No way out
(User Rating: 1 )
by Overstated on
Tuesday, 2nd August 2005 @ 06:40:37 PM AEST
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a Message)
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you should write more when your in this mood because i think youve captured a lovely honest style in your poetry with lines like 'But you’ve broken into me
And I found you’ve become a part of me'
p.s feel free to comment on my work too
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