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I Chose to Wait

Contributed by Kitty06 on Thursday, 28th July 2005 @ 09:50:06 PM in AEST
Topic: DarkPoetry



Darkness envelopes me
I am lost in the cruel sea
This is no ordinary sea, but the one of my memories
I worked so hard to make those two years seem like a dream
But when they hit the cruel blade of reality the blood of my heart spills into the sea

Raging and hurting, I claw at the walls right by my bed
No one was there to hold me when I cried and wished myself dead
My diary falls to the floor, its pages soiled with the angry scribbled writing and I wail and I howl
In the shower I scrub my skin raw until I bleed onto the bathroom towels
Suffering that can never be erased
You can never wipe away all those days in the hall when my throat shriveled and my heart raced

I am dragged back in that old hell
The place of which to my parents I could never tell
They didnt believe me then and they wouldnt believe me now
All I can think of is how did I survive? How?!

Not by an outside force, but by my own hand
Everyday inside my head I would rant
'It isnt fair! Why can they hurt me like this?'
'The moment I fight back Ill get sent to the **** deans office!'

Everyday I struggled and every night I cried
When J.K. Rowling came out oh how I wished for a ticket for the Hogwarts Express ride
Anything to get me out of the hole inside I hide

I got pushed down the stairs
Bullets and knives filled my nightmares
Life wasnt worth living at the time
Suicide was a sin so I just had to hope things would turn out fine

I got pushed down the stairs
I feared those ******** would sheer my precious locks of hair
I got kicked and I got punched
I always sat alone at lunch
The bus was terrible but gym was the worst
I felt as if my life had been cursed

My head slammed into lockers
Picked on and made fun of by all the preps and populars
I was nothing, I was scum
And now look at what Ive become

Im on top of the world
People ask permission to touch my glorious curls
All my fashion ideas are copied by the popular girls

My best friends are most the popular in school
And I am their leader, the definition of cool
The center of gossip, the queen of cute
Adored and sought after by the same people who beat me up to boot

I rose above those sheep
Never again must I be invisible or creep
I can sleep again without having to worry about the next day
All because I tossed aside death and chose instead to wait




Copyright © Kitty06 ... [ 2005-07-28 21:50:06]
(Date/Time posted on site)





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Re: I Chose to Wait (User Rating: 1 )
by vibes2go on Thursday, 28th July 2005 @ 10:20:35 PM AEST
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glad you chose to wait .. and being the queen of cute ..
what's that like ???


Re: I Chose to Wait (User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on Friday, 29th July 2005 @ 04:43:40 AM AEST
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All I have to say is a ****** kick *** poem, haha. SLipSiX.


Re: I Chose to Wait (User Rating: 1 )
by deathdrop on Friday, 29th July 2005 @ 04:54:50 AM AEST
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yes, this is deeply inspirational!
i hope it teaches all those who read it to stay strong!
from rosie.


Re: I Chose to Wait (User Rating: 1 )
by HatchetGirl on Wednesday, 3rd August 2005 @ 01:08:29 PM AEST
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hey you used that line
'the cruel blade of reality the blood of my heart spills'
And might I say very well placed. And yes,I can sort of relate... you see I was 'popular' before but I turned away from that because that wasn't me. But now I am a socalled 'freak' but it's fine because the 'freaks' out number the 'preps' at my school. So you would have been with us. And my friends protect each other. Anywayz, I too wish I could go through Platform 9 3/4... even if just in a dream.




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