|
 Menu
|
|
|
|
|
Social
|
|
|
|
|
Say NO!
Contributed by
bluesbaby811
on
Sunday, 31st July 2005 @ 01:34:50 AM in AEST
Topic:
toughstuff
|
I said NO
What do you not understand
I'm not some hoe
your not my man
I said NO
Why?
Because i can
I'm not a druggie
Do i look stoned?
My eyes all buggy
I said NO
I dont want beer
I dont want a shot
So give me a cheer
I ain't into pot
I said NO
Your drunk
I'm scared
I take my things from your trunk
You drive away
I'm left in the rain
I walk home that day
Cold but proud
I said NO
It's over
Now go
Copyright ©
bluesbaby811
... [
2005-07-31 01:34:50]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
Advertisments:
|
|
|
|
|
|
Sorry, comments are no longer allowed for anonymous, please register for a free membership to access this feature and more
|
|
All comments are owned by the poster. Your Poetry
Dot Com is not responsible for the content of any
comment.
That said, if you find an offensive comment, please
contact via the FeedBack Form with details, including poem title
etc.
|
|
|
Re: Say NO!
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Sunday, 31st July 2005 @ 01:37:16 AM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
| uhh lol nice poem kinda dramatic but i like it haha |
|
|
Re: Say NO!
(User Rating: 1 )
by rhyrhy on
Sunday, 31st July 2005 @ 02:18:48 AM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
Wow thats a good write. keep up the good work
come check out my poems!
your friend
rhyan |
|
|
Re: Say NO!
(User Rating: 1 )
by nosoup4crr on
Sunday, 31st July 2005 @ 03:57:38 AM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
| I think we need more poetry with attitude. I thought it was pretty inventive. I would love it if it ended on a personal note, though--with an abrupt end of some type. "Go back to subway/where I found you" or "your breath stand anyway." On a gramatical note, "your" in the 4th line should be "you're." And you make the same mistake about halfway down. If you add osme punctuation, it might make it flow better, as well. |
|
|
Re: Say NO!
(User Rating: 1 )
by priss on
Sunday, 31st July 2005 @ 02:25:07 PM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
| great poem, i really like this. you told him! |
|
|
Re: Say NO!
(User Rating: 1 )
by Dusty on
Sunday, 31st July 2005 @ 04:27:08 PM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
I like it. I could feel the power behind your words.
Great.
Dusty |
|
|
|
· 
Poetry
Community
Members
Areas
Reference
Search
Top
Others
