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Don't Hold Me Back
Contributed by
Jane_Doe
on
Wednesday, 10th August 2005 @ 07:35:57 PM in AEST
Topic:
DreamsandWishes
|
Unfortunately
For you, not me
I'm not so swayed
By the path you've laid
And told me to take
'Cause the ache
Inside
I cannot hide
I will not pretend
It didn't love and befriend
My longing soul
Ashley Nicole
A name
Craving fame
Begging for more
Than a life that's a bore
With the likes of you
It cannot do
Please
Don't tease
And allow me to
Break away from you
Enter the sea
Of dreams
Where
With prayer
I'll finally become
If you'll only succumb
My deepest desire
Hope on fire
A Star!
Copyright ©
Jane_Doe
... [
2005-08-10 19:35:57]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Don't Hold Me Back
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Wednesday, 10th August 2005 @ 08:34:47 PM AEST
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Info | Send
a Message)
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| An interesting write but I really did not understand where you were trying to go with this. Athough a good write. |
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Re: Don't Hold Me Back
(User Rating: 1 )
by colinbaker62 on
Thursday, 11th August 2005 @ 06:16:24 PM AEST
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a Message)
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This is very touching. I think I get the underlying theme.
Colin |
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Re: Don't Hold Me Back
(User Rating: 1 )
by Man_On_High on
Saturday, 20th August 2005 @ 05:56:04 PM AEST
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a Message)
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I absolutely understood you jane-
(lest the descriptive line before the work)
I like it very much..
a great subtle rhyming scheme
and very attractive, teardrop composition-
I can only say that dreams never die, only hope..
so keep hope alive and your dreams will come true.
Yours Truly..
B |
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