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Lonely Lover
Contributed by
FlirtQueen
on
Friday, 12th August 2005 @ 03:38:41 PM in AEST
Topic:
LostLove
|
Sitting all alone
in the middle of the night
waiting for the phone
frightened by the sight
it's you i see
you haunt my dreams
your starring at me
with starry eyed beams
i've lost all hope
where did we go wrong
we're heading down this slope
the journey's rough and long
you meant the world to me
and without realizing it your gone
leaving me to see
that you vanish with the dawn
you always were a jerk
making me always cry
saying you were at work
and leaving my love for you to die
i hope your happy
because now we're over
you told me i was "yappy"
but i've moved on to find a new 4 leaf clover
good-bye you fool
i don't care about you
and how you think you rule
you lost me and now your blue
a lonely lover you are
and i'm not losing sleep
while your sitting at the bar
trying not to weep!
Copyright ©
FlirtQueen
... [
2005-08-12 15:38:41]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Lonely Lover
(User Rating: 1 )
by PoeticLicense on
Saturday, 13th August 2005 @ 11:45:37 PM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
This topic has been so overworked. I know it's what's going on with a lot of people, but still...
But if theres a problem with this poem it's that the wording is not poetic. "you always were a jerk" is just not a good thing to say in a poem.
Keep writing, though. I don't mean to sound negative, these are just my feelings. |
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