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Broken Down
Contributed by
Kayden
on
Saturday, 20th August 2005 @ 05:20:25 AM in AEST
Topic:
SadPoetry
|
As we sit in the park I see
As we talk I see the real you
The dark heart that's true
The inside secrets of you
I look through the window
The window of your eyes
To see the world
The world through your ties
As I lay in your house as it falls
Surrounded by your lies
As I see the walls
Steadily, screaming out their cries
Falling down your hole
That use to be your soul
That will never be filled
Because you never feel
When I lay in your broken home
All I can see is destruction and pain
Of what used to be your life
What do we have when there is nothing to keep us sane
As I lay in your house as it falls
Surrounded by your lies
As I see the walls
Steadily, slowly, painfuly, screaming out their cries
When I sit on the roken rocks
The point of your life
And I lay, on the broken glass
The bed or shattered feelings
All I can do
Is help you start to build
But we will
Probably
End up reaking down ourselves
Copyright ©
Kayden
... [
2005-08-20 05:20:25]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Broken Down
(User Rating: 1 )
by Fernanda_F_Rocha on
Saturday, 20th August 2005 @ 08:26:58 AM AEST
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Info | Send
a Message)
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When i start read Your poems it catch my attention, I like the first 4 verses, the style. Then the other 4 are in a different style...seems be another poem...good also but dífferent.
Apologise if dont express myself in the best way and hope You dont take it wrong. I usualy dont like to comment others work because i'm not an expert to do it. Its just an oponion and nothing more :)
good writting too. |
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Re: Broken Down
(User Rating: 1 )
by xXxmegsxXx on
Sunday, 21st August 2005 @ 04:46:46 PM AEST
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a Message)
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| i like this poem alot, its a really good write, well done |
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Re: Broken Down
(User Rating: 1 )
by Mallard8 on
Tuesday, 13th December 2005 @ 05:33:13 PM AEST
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Info | Send
a Message)
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Interesting I really enjoyed it though! I am assuming it was a boyfriend that broke your heart and you wanted to get back together yet knew it wouldn't work out... greatly written...
Sc |
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