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The Game
Contributed by
waos
on
Monday, 29th August 2005 @ 01:50:55 AM in AEST
Topic:
SadPoetry
|
I hear your footsteps approaching,
yet you haven't stepped yet.
I hear your voice encroaching,
yet you haven't spoken yet.
Now I lie,
cracked but not broken.
Now I cry,
bruised, but not beaten.
Soften a heart with surprise,
catch her unawares.
Cache her tears and save them
bring a rainbow to her nightmares.
Build block towers to destroy,
scatter to pieces.
Promise brighter days,
when the rain never ceases.
'And I see your lies.
I hear them in your voice,
I read them between the lines.
You've left me no choice.'
Now I lie,
cracked but not broken.
Now I cry,
bruised, but not beaten.
Called to empty pastures,
safely kept alone.
To rest in waving fields,
the sky my only gravestone.
~For the one who doesn't know~
Copyright ©
waos
... [
2005-08-29 01:50:55]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: The Game
(User Rating: 1 )
by emystar on
Monday, 29th August 2005 @ 02:24:47 AM AEST
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Info | Send
a Message)
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A bit sad but well done.
huggs,
emy |
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Re: The Game
(User Rating: 1 )
by bobotheclown on
Monday, 5th September 2005 @ 04:26:36 PM AEST
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a Message)
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Good poem Kara I liked the chorus part and
how you mentuon that you are not broken or
beaten although the last line gave me cause
for worry... I think you know this but I will
mention it again that NO ONE is worth killing
yourself over. All in all a great poem I am a bit
to scatter brained to take much of an in-depth
look at this.
Bobo (Joel) |
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Re: The Game
(User Rating: 1 )
by blowfish_jane on
Tuesday, 6th September 2005 @ 05:33:18 AM AEST
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Kara, this was just WOW!!!! you know what i mean?
It's simple and yet it has that ability to make you sit and re-read it again, out loud.
A sensational poem, thanks for sharing it.
Jane~ |
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Re: The Game
(User Rating: 1 )
by Silent-No-More on
Sunday, 9th October 2005 @ 11:30:02 AM AEST
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Well... I, for one, think this deserves more attention than it seems to have gotten. You've embedded a lot here... a reader would have to be unfeeling, I think, not to notice as much. For me... it is the absence of action in this piece (the lack of speaking, stepping, beating, breaking, I mean) that had the most impact. It is perhaps because (in my experience anyway) in those quiet moments when you find yourself alone and still that fear and pain and need and even, perhaps, helplessness - cannot be denied.
Obviously moved by this,
~Snemmy |
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Re: The Game
(User Rating: 1 )
by Blu on
Tuesday, 11th October 2005 @ 08:22:21 PM AEST
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My god...
I've been away from this site for quite some time, but you're always one of the poets I keep an eye out for when I return.
Kara, every piece you write outdoes the last. This gave me chills. And your choice of description is not only incredibly real (atleast to me), it allowed me to see myself in "empty pastures, safely kept alone. To rest in waving fields, the sky my only gravestone."
Beautiful and touching. Once again, you have pushed me to continue writing. Thank you.
Blu |
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