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You helped him break me
Contributed by
lau
on
Wednesday, 7th September 2005 @ 11:02:21 AM in AEST
Topic:
drugabuse
|
you helped him break me
made the tears flow even faster
the damage you caused
helping create them painful scars
this little girl
the one that used to hide on the stairs
has been torn apart
ring a roses
is a distant memory
hidden
lost
in this terrible pain
the damage you caused
but u dont know
your focused on your pain
and cant c the heartache
which lies with your baby girl
the same girl
who danced to top of the pops
is the girl who cries herself to sleep
this misery
has torn
her
apart
Copyright ©
lau
... [
2005-09-07 11:02:21]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: You helped him break me
(User Rating: 1 )
by WAE on
Wednesday, 7th September 2005 @ 03:14:10 PM AEST
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a Message)
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Very emotional. I would recommend some spellcheck though.
Good luck,
Alex |
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Re: You helped him break me
(User Rating: 1 )
by JenJen on
Wednesday, 7th September 2005 @ 04:14:52 PM AEST
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a Message)
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very emotional
spell check
kep it up
jeni |
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Re: You helped him break me
(User Rating: 1 )
by Pisces101 on
Wednesday, 7th September 2005 @ 05:51:03 PM AEST
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good write. except i don't think you are very in touch with how you feel about this or if you know exactly what has happened to you. if you go back through this poem and write in specifics i'm sure it will help you not only in your writing but emotionally. this poem is only missing fillers. you've left the reader wondering. keep writing. great job.
sarah |
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Re: You helped him break me
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Wednesday, 7th September 2005 @ 07:02:48 PM AEST
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Emotionally abstract.
It may mean a lot to you, but this makes absolutely no connection to either me, or my emotions, whatsoever.
Try have your writing make sense - its the only way you'll feel better through the medium.
N_F |
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Re: You helped him break me
(User Rating: 1 )
by wordmusefindme on
Monday, 20th December 2010 @ 10:24:32 AM AEST
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a Message)
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| this is old but i am here now reading it. i've met that girl, time and again, sometimes fun, sometimes not so fun. words written help us think or collect thoughts. no one is ever far from the precipice but maybe that has the best views of sunrise,moonrise. I hope that realizing that you were broke helped you find a repair. I've cried,no one cares, the only one who drys the tears is them that sheds em. |
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