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Farewell to a dream
Contributed by
lostinmyself
on
Wednesday, 28th September 2005 @ 04:44:22 PM in AEST
Topic:
EmotionalPoetry
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Hold my hand and tell me it will be okay,
Look at me again, in that special way.
Pull me close, be here tonight,
Tell me again, why this feels so right.
Write to me of waters, blue,
Take me, I want to see them with you.
Feel my heart, hear it beat,
Cuddle close, lets go to sleep,
I miss my dreams, 'cause though untrue,
Inside them I can be with you.
Catch my breath and let you go,
It hurts, but I can't let it show.
To hold on tight is harder still,
So though it hurts, I know I will.
But hold my hand this one last time,
To remind me once, that you were mine.
And ignore the tears that sting my face,
They'll wash you away, and leave no trace,
...It's hard to say goodbye, my dream,
But I'll say goodbye, to what could have been.
Copyright ©
lostinmyself
... [
2005-09-28 16:44:22]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Farewell to a dream
(User Rating: 1 )
by WAE on
Wednesday, 28th September 2005 @ 06:55:42 PM AEST
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Hey Phil,
It must have been really tough... I'll PM... |
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Re: Farewell to a dream
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Wednesday, 28th September 2005 @ 07:38:20 PM AEST
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| WOW PHIL! Such emotion and raw power in these words! This is one of your best! |
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Re: Farewell to a dream
(User Rating: 1 )
by Evening_Star on
Wednesday, 28th September 2005 @ 08:02:34 PM AEST
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As I was reading this I thought to myself you remind me of Eugene Field and the way I felt reading his Little Boy. It almost made me want cry. I look forward to reading more of your stuff
Liz |
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Re: Farewell to a dream
(User Rating: 1 )
by Evilcaf on
Wednesday, 28th September 2005 @ 09:31:41 PM AEST
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| that is beautiful, so hard to say goodbye sometimes, tc xxxxx |
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Re: Farewell to a dream
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Wednesday, 28th September 2005 @ 11:22:26 PM AEST
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This is beautifull and gives new meaning 2 the addage, " Read It And Weep " u are a
poet from a past life reincarnated and a true
21st century heroin of the written word, this choked me up while i was reading it, your a
an amazing writter please phill, do some thing with it while your young and able to . . .
(((((phill)))))
Ben |
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Re: Farewell to a dream
(User Rating: 1 )
by Fionndruinne on
Thursday, 29th September 2005 @ 01:21:05 AM AEST
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This is very powerful, and I love how both of the stanzas have such meaningful conclusions. The longing and sadness shine through in such a graceful way...
Well done, my friend. I wish you joy.
Andrew |
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Re: Farewell to a dream
(User Rating: 1 )
by Vampirequeen on
Thursday, 29th September 2005 @ 02:40:03 AM AEST
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Yes i believe Orphy is right about this one.
wow |
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Re: Farewell to a dream
(User Rating: 1 )
by justkevi on
Thursday, 29th September 2005 @ 05:56:02 PM AEST
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Great rhythm and rhyme
It's so strange how we write our best work when we ought to be the least able to.
I'm sorry. |
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Re: Farewell to a dream
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Thursday, 29th September 2005 @ 07:49:22 PM AEST
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*puts tissue down and trys to regain composure...*
Oh Phil, this was so beautiful and sad. It really tugged on my
heart, for I too, have felt this. And you captured the emotions
so very well, my friend. It flows so effortlessly and your words fit
remarkably well. A truly magnificent write. One that I shall return
to again and again.
*hugs*
~Breezy |
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Re: Farewell to a dream
(User Rating: 1 )
by Loende on
Friday, 30th September 2005 @ 06:59:21 AM AEST
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This was just amazing. It made my own heart ache. Thank you for saying that which I was unable to. Fabulous write.
Be well,
Loende |
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Re: Farewell to a dream
(User Rating: 1 )
by Jen54 on
Friday, 30th September 2005 @ 02:15:19 PM AEST
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| That was such a beautiful poem. I almost started to cry. Great job!!! |
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Re: Farewell to a dream
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Friday, 30th September 2005 @ 03:09:34 PM AEST
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*****Write to me of waters, blue,
Well, that is a cleansing line, emotions running at its best. How are you current feelings?
This write has words coming straight from the heart. I hope you do not become insecure, and I pray you find someone to care for, and cares for you. Take care, this write has left me cold with tears, so good write, did what it was meant to give, feelings of sadness.
Raquel Leah :D
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Re: Farewell to a dream
(User Rating: 1 )
by Wachumiri on
Tuesday, 4th October 2005 @ 06:13:05 AM AEST
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Written with great elegance.... It brought up many memories for me in my life. May I say goodbye to what was.
Take care.
David |
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Re: Farewell to a dream
(User Rating: 1 )
by Stitch on
Wednesday, 5th October 2005 @ 12:08:24 PM AEST
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Phil, as heartfelt and touching as this is, what really shines through for me is how incredibly well written it is! Have you tried publishing this? I can see a whole line of products with your name on them (like Maya Angelou does for Hallmark). This is very impressive!
Stitch 8) |
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Re: Farewell to a dream
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Wednesday, 5th October 2005 @ 12:55:11 PM AEST
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| I left you some thoughts in ap, but I won't go into that here. You have much talent Phillygirl!!!!! |
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Re: Farewell to a dream
(User Rating: 1 )
by darkangeleyes57 on
Thursday, 6th October 2005 @ 12:14:18 PM AEST
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beautiful and sad. I thought this was so beautiful and you did have me let a few tears slip. it is sad when the only way you can be with someone you love is through your dreams and it is hard to deal with that when they start to fade.. great poem
christina |
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Re: Farewell to a dream
(User Rating: 1 )
by Willofree on
Thursday, 6th October 2005 @ 05:44:52 PM AEST
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Beautifully written poem. The emotion and feelings really come through on this one.The rhyme and flow were wonderful.
Well done, Philly
Will |
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Re: Farewell to a dream
(User Rating: 1 )
by FleurdeSang on
Friday, 7th October 2005 @ 05:49:06 PM AEST
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To reveal such a sorrowful and personal part of your life, and yourself, for others to read... is very brave, my dear. A love that once was, still remembered, and yearned for... yet, you say Farewell to that beautiful dream now melted and flowing away... Weeping cleanses the soul, cheri... Like they say, better out than in, :-P. This was a gorgeous piece of poetic perfection, my sweet Phil. And I'm not much for rhyming, but like Nazzy's writes, yours leave me breathless... I've come to enjoy rhyming poems more now after I read this. Vivid, melancholic, reckless... but there is a hint of hope and strength lingering there... I hope you've found it, and used it, :). Sending you many smiles, hugs, and kisses!! exquisite write, once more. Thank you for sharing! All my love. Forever,
Your dear friend/avid fan,
~*Stephy*~ *hugs* ;-) |
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Re: Farewell to a dream
(User Rating: 1 )
by WAE on
Monday, 10th October 2005 @ 05:44:15 PM AEST
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So sweet and touchy...
Alex |
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Re: Farewell to a dream
(User Rating: 1 )
by blowfish_jane on
Thursday, 13th October 2005 @ 11:03:59 AM AEST
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Phil *Hugs*
This was such an emotive poem, I know it’s not adequate to say that but it’s true this was just so emotionally heart breaking to read.
I know those words so well, so I guess that’s why I feel them more than I should have. You have written a masterpiece and that’s not a term I use on a day-to-day basis.
Well done on this poignant piece Phil.
Jane~
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Re: Farewell to a dream
(User Rating: 1 )
by Willofree on
Tuesday, 18th October 2005 @ 08:03:52 PM AEST
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Very touching and tender write. i really like the verse and the rhyme scheme. The emotion and hurt comes through in this heart felt write.
Fantastic poem, Philly
Will |
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Re: Farewell to a dream
(User Rating: 1 )
by Gothchyk on
Tuesday, 25th October 2005 @ 07:15:14 PM AEST
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| great write, fits my circumstances perfectly, thanks for sharing. |
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Re: Farewell to a dream
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Sunday, 20th November 2005 @ 09:11:51 PM AEST
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Aw, PhillyGirl, this is a beautiful and sad write. You express your emotions excellently.
I enjoyed reading this very much.
Take care,
Tim
:-) |
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Re: Farewell to a dream
(User Rating: 1 )
by Lo2681 on
Sunday, 14th May 2006 @ 10:34:01 PM AEST
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Very beautifull put. I love this piece
~Lo |
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Re: Farewell to a dream
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Tuesday, 6th June 2006 @ 08:24:47 PM AEST
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your not only good but your so dedicated that makes u great. what a beautiful composition.
u speak of love beautifuly and show your heart as skillfuly as a lady should. more than just good this was enjoyabl phill.
((((Phill))))
Ben |
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