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Burning
Contributed by
justkevi
on
Wednesday, 28th September 2005 @ 09:19:26 PM in AEST
Topic:
DarkPoetry
|
The pain, the fire, the ember inside
Vividly it burns, the colors so bright
Like a fireball tearing my skin
Im being eaten alive from within
What crime did I do, what divine rule did I break
Soon I will fall and leave naught in my wake
Let me burn as I stand
Keep your pity at hand
Im burning on the inside
Copyright ©
justkevi
... [
2005-09-28 21:19:26]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Burning
(User Rating: 1 )
by vampyrekiss on
Thursday, 29th September 2005 @ 06:23:11 PM AEST
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Info | Send
a Message)
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| good write also good imagery |
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Re: Burning
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Friday, 30th September 2005 @ 12:26:39 AM AEST
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a Message)
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Hello JustKevi:
I like your write here, very nice.
Oh yes pain, sickness, unhappiness, conflict. There is a problem that hurts.
Your spirit energy could be polluted and in need of cleansing, inspired or renewed.
Could you be having guilt, shame. Some kind of powerlessness, your inner fear threatens you.
Your cold feelings, turn into energy, a fiery release, perhaps that is the passion trying to escape..
Good write, wow.
Raquel Leah :D
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Re: Burning
(User Rating: 1 )
by Loende on
Friday, 30th September 2005 @ 06:55:16 AM AEST
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This really spoke loudly to me. I loved the last few lines. It was short, sweet and to the point. Nice work!
Be well,
Loende |
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Re: Burning
(User Rating: 1 )
by AshRayne on
Sunday, 2nd October 2005 @ 01:41:10 PM AEST
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i personally do not care for pity, for others thinking that i am weak. sometimes we mistake concern for pity, i know i did. don't be afraid to take the hand offered. sometimes it is the inspiration that we seek, and the passion makes us stronger.
Exquisite writing that is your gift, be blessed, for you are perfection.
~Ash |
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Re: Burning
(User Rating: 1 )
by ChibiMiroku on
Wednesday, 12th October 2005 @ 03:47:13 PM AEST
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a Message)
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| I liked how the poem did lots of description about something, yet still left it up to the reader to infer what it was about. Good write! |
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